Hissy Fit Read online Lani Lynn Vale (Southern Gentleman #1)

Categories Genre: Alpha Male, Contemporary, Funny, Romance, Sports Tags Authors: Series: The Southern Gentleman Series by Lani Lynn Vale
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Total pages in book: 72
Estimated words: 70741 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 354(@200wpm)___ 283(@250wpm)___ 236(@300wpm)
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Each twist had her breasts jiggling precariously in the small, spaghetti-strapped black dress until suddenly the bull jolted forward and knocked her ass over tea kettle onto the ground.

She sat up laughing her ass off, and that was when Camryn turned to me.

“We have to do that,” she ordered.

I bit my lip, looking warily at the bull, and shook my head. “I dunno…”

I looked down at my cast, then back up at her.

“Come on,” she pleaded.

It took me another entire drink to agree, and only then did I say yes if she went first.

Which was what she did moments later.

Camryn hurried to the bull, her hand on the banister that led to the lower stage, allowing everyone in the establishment to see what was happening down below.

And then she stood beside the bull and thought about the best way to get up onto it.

“Run and jump!” I hollered.

Camryn flipped me off with a small grin on her face.

I grinned back, then called out a ‘woo hoo!’ to her as she started to mount it.

Camryn had just climbed up on the bull around the time that Croft walked in the door with his date, momentarily distracting me from Camryn’s start.

I gasped and started down the stairs, wanting to get a better look at Camryn’s face when she realized that my brother had seen her ride.

By the time she was bucked off moments later, I was standing beside where she was sprawled indelicately on the mat and we were both laughing.

I climbed onto the mat and wrapped my arms around her. “Oh, God! That was great!”

Camryn held onto my head and pulled me to her side, shaking with her laughter. “That was fun, you should go!”

I stood up, wobbled, and then reached for the bull to steady myself.

My gaze was caught by a commotion at the stairs, and that was when I saw Coach Butthead heading down toward me.

“That sounds like the best thing I’ve ever heard!” I declared.

Then, before my brother or Coach Grumpy Pants could stop me, I climbed on the bull and pointed at the man controlling it. “Hit it!”

The bull controller ‘hit it’ and then I was hanging on for dear life while also trying not to laugh my ass off in the process.

I even got one second longer before I, too, went flying just as easily as Camryn had moments before.

I hit the mat hard and awkwardly.

My casted arm hit the metal underneath the bull that controlled its movements, and I cried out as pain radiated up my elbow and into my heart.

“Owwww,” I whined, my drunkenness clearing the tiniest of bits. “That hurt!”

Then I rolled over to see a pair of black Under Armour wind pants with our school mascot on them standing next to my face.

I rolled over onto my back and looked up the long, lean body of Coach McDuff, and wondered if this was heaven.

Surely it had to be.

But then I got to his face and saw he was scowling at me.

It must be hell.

“Am I in hell?” I asked the coach that was glaring at me.

“No, but you might wish you were after I’m through with you,” he growled irately.

Oh, Coach McDuff was pissed.

He reached down for my good arm, and I slapped him away. “Don’t touch me, Coach Cheater McCheaterson.”

Ezra ignored me and hauled me up to standing beside him, causing my world to tilt on its axis for a few long seconds.

“Whoa,” I chortled. “That was fun!”

“Are you drunk?” he asked, sounding just as miffed as he had been when I was lying down.

“I don’t know,” I admitted. “Until today, I’ve never drunk a single alcoholic beverage before! What does drunk look like?”

“You,” my brother grunted as he stared at me. “I can almost see your boobs.”

I looked down at said boobs. “I have a t-shirt on.”

“You have a freakin’ tank top on, and you’re not wearing a bra,” he challenged.

I frowned. “I am, too.” I then pulled my bra strap out of my tank top to show the dumbass. “See?”

“Do something with her, she’s embarrassing me,” my brother ordered the man holding onto me.

I started to push away. “No! I have things to do!”

“No, you don’t,” Ezra disagreed. “In fact, you have to work tomorrow, so it’s probably best that you stop drinking now. With any luck, I can get some coffee and water in you and make you halfway presentable for tomorrow. You got Camryn?”

“I’m not going to work tomorrow,” I declared. “I quit!”

“You’re not quitting, hoe!” Camryn yelled. “If you quit, then who will I talk about all the great asses of the school to?”

“That’s gross,” the woman, Croft’s date, said. “Those are children.”

Camryn looked over at the woman, who likely shouldn’t be privy to this conversation. “I was talking about Coach McDuff,” she hitched a thumb in Ezra’s direction. “And the assistant coach. And the girls’ softball coach, as well as one of the science teachers—he’s new this year, and yowza, does he have one fine ass. It was a tossup between him and Coach McDuff this year, to be honest. Not children, you freakin’ loser.”


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