Total pages in book: 83
Estimated words: 76857 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 384(@200wpm)___ 307(@250wpm)___ 256(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 76857 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 384(@200wpm)___ 307(@250wpm)___ 256(@300wpm)
I was a resentful young woman who wanted a great deal. One who had been forced into the position of fighting for what I desired.
Cyderial lost my attention completely, so I might snarl at his guest, “I can’t go into the fog unless I have been ruined.” The look of horror on the stranger’s face fed me to continue. “You have all the power, and we have none. Condemn me if you want, but I’m not sorry for wanting more than life in a cage.”
Golden head tilted, the stranger tutted at me and shook his head. “Tonight, you saw what happens when stupid girls leave their cage, didn’t you?”
I had seen much in my stolen time exploring the city—beautiful things that made me think there might actually be hope of a pleasant life outside these walls. I saw couples walking without fear. And then I saw the truth. “I saw men who couldn’t control themselves get to do as they pleased, wear what they wanted, and not be treated as if their very existence were shameful and dangerous.” The remainder of my rant was for General Cyderial, my attention and anger all his while it was my turn to glare. “So what if I want to wear a dress and explore the city I’m supposed to lay down my life for? There is nothing wrong with being feminine! Nothing to hide about what we are or the things we’re naturally drawn to. The academy forces us to live a lie. To dress like men. To act like men. We are not men!”
General Cyderial somewhat softened. “Lorieyn, if I let you wander, there would be wars fought in the streets over you. Two males are banging at the academy’s doors after a few minutes in your presence. By morning, one of them will have killed the other. A preventable loss of life.”
I had no idea men would act crazy just from hearing my song. That wasn’t exactly taught in the academy! “What of my life? I refuse to be accountable, when men in power fail to explain the details of mating to females. Even the humans don’t know!”
Jaw jumping, Cyderial ground his teeth. “I’ve answered every question you’ve asked.”
“Half-truths and generalizations! Women deserve to know how our bodies work and what you’re going to do to us.” Gesturing at the giant, I sent him a sneer. “Maeve is terrified right now, because this idiot stuck his tongue in her mouth and she doesn’t understand why.”
The idiot offered a response that almost sounded like an apology. “It takes a truly powerful man to be able to control themselves in the presence of their unmated female. Even I had Maeve against the wall with my hand up her skirt within moments of hearing her song. If anyone other than you had approached, I would have killed every man at that bar. Old friends, brothers, my subordinates… all of them.”
If I hadn’t seen it with my own eyes, I would not have believed an adult so incapable of self-control. Men really were feral. To Cyderial, I said, “Sir, I calculated the odds, ran as much surveillance as time would allow, and waited until there was low occupancy at the bar. I didn’t think anyone would notice me, let alone get hurt. I just needed to find one male willing to ruin me who wasn’t an academy boy you would murder. And like I said, Maeve was only trying to bring me home. When she couldn’t, she stayed to keep me safe.”
He wasn’t buying it.
It would seem General Cyderial understood far more than I’d hoped. “Things did not work out as expected, and you only returned to the academy to keep her safe. So that you could lie for her.” The general let out a careful breath, bones in his hands cracking when he tightened his fists. “If not for your loyalty to Maeve, you would have wandered the streets until a male agreed to mutilate you, assuming you didn’t get caught by a suitor and bonded in his frenzy.”
There had to be a way to get at least one male to understand why I had been pushed to such a point. Pleading, I said, “You hear the song from a woman. I hear a song in the fog. What lengths wouldn’t you go to for your mate?”
“I will go to any length for my mate.” He looked at me as if he understood perfectly. Understood and despaired. “Even if my actions earn her hatred.”
Maybe there was some hope after all! It felt as if a thousand-pound weight fell from my shoulders, my relief setting me alight. “Then you do understand!”
It felt as if for the first time the two of us shared a moment of pure agreement—a mutual accord. Something that might’ve even seen that night set right.