Total pages in book: 59
Estimated words: 56416 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 282(@200wpm)___ 226(@250wpm)___ 188(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 56416 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 282(@200wpm)___ 226(@250wpm)___ 188(@300wpm)
There’s so much more I want to say, but I hold back because I’m already pushing my luck. We continue to eat, and she tells me about her photoshoot today. She asks me about my day, and I’m vague when I tell her it was busy with appointments, which is not totally a lie. I’ve had back-to-back appointments, and they would have continued through the day if I didn’t cancel them all to be here for this.
“Do you want dessert? I can call Janice and—”
She is shaking her head, putting her hand across her stomach. “No, I can’t eat another thing.”
I rest my elbows on the table. “Okay. Next question. Do you want to watch a movie?”
I gesture to the corner of the room, where I have the couch and a large screen television set up. She points at herself. “You want to watch a movie with me?”
I nod at her without speaking.
Her brows draw in with confusion on her face, but she doesn’t push it. “Okay.”
“Comedy, action, or romance?”
I move across the room, and she stands up. “Comedy.”
I turn the television on and look at the movies I downloaded earlier. I turn on the first comedy, and Haven starts to clean up the table.
“Stop. Janice will get that later.”
She stands up and walks toward me at a slow pace. I can see the hesitancy on her face, and I point at the couch. “Sit down. I can sit next to you or I can sit in one of the chairs. It’s up to you. You’re the boss here, Haven.”
She sits down on the couch and looks up at me. She takes a deep breath, and I know it’s hard for her when she says, “You can sit down next to me.”
I move slowly because I don’t want to spook her, and when I sit down, I make sure that no part of my body touches hers.
I point to the well-known comedy on the television. “Is this okay with you?”
She doesn’t look at me as she says, “Yeah, this is funny.”
I lean back in my seat and hate that everything has turned awkward. I’m pushing too hard, but I can’t help it. There’s no doubt I want her, and initially I was drawn to her beauty, but now it’s something more. I want to see her smile, I want to see her happy, and I want to see her get everything she wants out of life. It’s fast—hell it’s all happening too fast, but nothing I do can get her out of my head. I’m constantly thinking about her, worried about her or wondering if she’s okay.
There are so many reasons I should walk away from her. One being that I’m fifteen years older than her and another is her lack of experience. I don’t want to steamroll her or pressure her in any way. In this instant, I convince myself that I need to slow down.
Before I fuck this up and she doesn’t want anything to do with me.
7
HAVEN
The movie is almost over, and luckily I’ve seen it a few times or else I wouldn’t have a clue what’s going on. I have stared at the screen in front of me, but I haven’t paid attention. All of my thoughts are on the massive man sitting next to me. About halfway through the movie, he turned his hand palm up on the cushion between us. He hasn’t said anything about it, but it’s like the elephant in the room because that’s all I can think about.
I’m attracted to my cuddler. I shouldn’t be, and I’m sure it’s against some kind of rule, but I can’t help it. I’m not sure how anyone can not fall for his charm. Just being with him makes me feel protected, seen, and heard. It’s like his whole focus is on me and what I have to say. Of course, he is paid to do just that.
I have to keep reminding myself that this is not a date… even though it sure feels like one.
“No pressure, Haven.”
I’m so lost in my own thoughts I’m not even sure what he’s talking about. I turn to look at him, and he’s so close. “Huh?”
He doesn’t look at me. “No pressure. I can almost hear the wheels turning, and your mind is working in overtime. No pressure, just enjoy the movie.”
His hand flexes, and I think about what it would be like if I put my hand in his. Yea, I shook his hand but I imagine this would be different. His hand would be firm but flexible. It would be way bigger than mine, and I wonder what that would feel like. Would it be like a hug for my hand? While all these thoughts whirl in my head, I’m still not saying anything.
He finally looks at me, and I have to suck in a breath the way his eyes are a darker brown and laced with hunger. If I doubted his attraction to me, I don’t now. This is more than a therapy session. At least it sure as heck feels like it.