Total pages in book: 98
Estimated words: 91216 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 456(@200wpm)___ 365(@250wpm)___ 304(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 91216 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 456(@200wpm)___ 365(@250wpm)___ 304(@300wpm)
“But I want . . . I have fantasies. Dark Secrets has opened something up deep inside of me.”
“Honey, passion can be cultivated. If Jack’s the one you want a future with, then you two can explore and grow together. Who knows? Maybe he’s got a kinky side waiting to be unleashed.”
There’s no way I can’t laugh at that. “Maybe you’re right.”
“Of course I’m right. I’m always right,” Sloane says smugly.
But then I think of ending it with WinterWatcher and my gut twists. I don’t want that. Waiting for his message is like waiting for Christmas morning as a kid. Yes, I know nothing about this man other than what gets him hard. But . . . I don’t want to let him go either.
“I’ve been the good girl my entire life. The people pleaser. The one that settles. Accepts. Being on Dark Secrets . . . it lets me unleash another side of myself.” I pause, surprised by what I’m realizing. “I really, really like that side. And this WinterWatcher guy, he gets that. I think Jack may represent the side of me that’s safe and familiar. The side everyone expects me to be.”
Sloane is quiet for a moment, considering my words. “I get that. But who says you can’t be both? You don’t have to choose between being ‘good’ and being ‘dirty.’ The right person will accept all sides of you.”
I sigh, fiddling with the necklace again, remembering how WinterWatcher had untied the ribbon around my neck. Jesus the man was hot. So fucking hot.
“I suppose you’re right. It’s just . . . I’m not sure Jack is that person.”
“Well then, maybe you need to end it with Jack,” Sloane suggests, and I hate those words just as much as ending it with WinterWatcher.
I groan, feeling more confused than ever. “I don’t know if I can end it with either of them.”
“Then maybe you need more time,” Sloane says gently. “You don’t have to make a decision right this second. Why not spend more time with both of them and see how things develop?”
“But isn’t that leading them on?” I ask, guilt gnawing at me.
“Not if you’re honest about where you’re at,” Sloane points out. “You can tell them both that you’re exploring your options and not ready for anything exclusive yet. That way, everyone’s on the same page.”
I consider this, turning the idea over in my mind. It feels a bit uncomfortable, but also . . . freeing. “I guess that could work. But what if they’re not okay with it?”
“Then that’s valuable information too,” Sloane says. “If either of them can’t handle you taking the time you need to figure things out, then maybe they’re not the right fit for you anyway.”
She has a point. I take a deep breath, feeling some of the tension leave my body. “Okay. Yeah. I think I can do that. I may feel guilty though.”
“Screw guilt. You aren’t doing anything wrong. It’s not like you are declaring your love, nor are they. Yet.”
I take a deep breath.
“And you shouldn’t spend the holidays alone anyway. This is good for you. You deserve this after all the pain you’ve been through. It’s about time you had a holly jolly holiday.”
“You’re right. I am tired of moping around and feeling sorry for myself.”
“That’s my girl,” Sloane says warmly. “Just remember, you’re allowed to take your time. You’re allowed to explore. And most importantly, you’re allowed to put yourself first. It’s time to do you. Chloe era.”
As I’m about to respond, my phone buzzes with a new notification. My heart leaps as I see it’s a message from WinterWatcher on Dark Secrets.
“Oh god,” I whisper.
“What? What is it?” Sloane asks, concern in her voice.
“It’s him. WinterWatcher. He just messaged me.”
“Well, don’t leave me hanging! What does it say?”
I swallow hard, my finger hovering over the notification. “I . . . I haven’t opened it yet.”
“Girl, if you don’t open that message right now, I swear I’ll reach through this phone and do it myself!”
Laughing nervously, I tap the notification. The app opens, revealing his message:
Last night was unforgettable. I can’t stop thinking about you. When can I see you again?
My breath catches in my throat. “Oh wow.”
“What? What did he say?” Sloane demands.
I read her the message, my voice shaky.
“Damn,” Sloane whistles. “Sounds like Mr. Mysterious is just as smitten as you are.”
“Yeah,” I say, staring at the screen. “What do I do now?”
“Well, if you’re going with the ‘explore your options’ plan, I’d say you message him back. Set up another meeting. But be clear about where you stand.”
I nod, even though she can’t see me. “Right. Okay. I can do that.”
Chapter Twenty-Five
Jack
I know I promised myself that I’d confess my stalking ways to Chloe today, but when morning comes . . . I can’t. I’m not ready to let her go. Not just yet.