Total pages in book: 89
Estimated words: 83379 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 417(@200wpm)___ 334(@250wpm)___ 278(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 83379 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 417(@200wpm)___ 334(@250wpm)___ 278(@300wpm)
And what was I thinking? What if Sienna had returned to the paddock and saw us standing so close together? Or Ainsley had finished with Dr. Barnes and ran up on us?
And so what if they did? I was simply helping him get over his trepidation around horses. He was thrumming with the same raw energy as the night of his bad dream, and I wanted to assist him in bridging that gap between his irrational fears and his curiosity.
Why did a badass soldier—an explosives guy, no less—feel uncomfortable around horses in the first place? His mom had been raised around them, though that wasn’t always a good predictor of interest; look at me and my family’s ranch. Besides, Aunt Melinda hadn’t stuck around in Wyoming and didn’t visit all that often, so maybe that had something to do with it.
I also wondered if Julian’s fears stemmed from the same reasons my daughter was struggling so much. The aftereffects of a traumatic event. We certainly would’ve never guessed that Ainsley would develop the kind of anxiety she did after such an ordeal. So maybe these animals seemed as uncertain to Julian as some things did for Ainsley. Julian also had nightmares, and it seemed to me that he worked himself to the bone on the silo every day just to keep moving.
After delivering a basket of fresh eggs to Marta, and while Ainsley chilled out with a favorite show in the family room, I hopped on a four-wheeler and headed toward the silo. It was midafternoon, and I really had no business interrupting him like this, but I wanted to tell him that I didn’t mean to take off like that on him. He might’ve thought I regretted our time by the fence, and it wasn’t that at all. But I absolutely didn’t want to give Julian the wrong idea about what happened either. So maybe a talk was in order. To lay all the cards on the table.
Julian had kept the door propped wide open, likely to let the air and sunshine in while he took a broom to the floor. And who could blame him. The last of the boxes had been moved out—George and I had helped him relocate them either to the trash bin or the appropriate barn—and he probably wanted everything looking and smelling clean and fresh before he decided what needed to be built with the lumber that had recently been delivered. Inhaling all that dust wasn’t good for anyone, and given his time in the service—as well as the brief glances inside his room—he was definitely a tidy person. Not that you could bounce a quarter off his bed, or whatever the folklore was about new recruits in the military, but he undeniably appeared to be much neater than me.
Sienna had also been checking in with him along the way to make sure their visions still matched, and the way they’d chattered away excitedly about the floor plans at the dinner table or some evenings on the porch was infectious. I had confidence in Julian, and so did Sienna. She’d invited him clear across the country to help us, after all, and thought he was up for the job. Though my ex-mother-in-law and Aunt Melinda no doubt had a lot to do with the decision.
I gave the door a light rap with my knuckles so as not to startle him. “Hey there.”
He paused with the broom near where one of the metal ladders still remained. They’d decided to incorporate them into the design, which would be a cross between industrial and country chic. Not that I really understood what that meant.
“What’s the occasion?”
It wasn’t that strange for me to show up, but it was normally when he needed help with something.
“Just wanted to see how you were comin’ along,” I said in the most nonchalant voice I could muster.
“Yeah?” he asked pointedly, and my cheeks heated from the lie.
“Honestly, I came here to say that I…” I stepped farther into the room, looking behind me to make sure we were alone. “Well, I didn’t want to give you the wrong idea…earlier.”
He propped the broom against the wall. “By the fence with Mercy?”
“Yeah. I sort of took off, and it’s just that…I should be more careful around here.” I lifted my hat and ran my fingers through my hair in frustration. “If someone saw us…”
“Feeding a horse?” He arched an eyebrow.
“Suppose that sounds dumb.” I kicked at a small stone on the floor. “But I think you know what I mean.”
His jaw was tight as he shrugged. “Maybe I don’t.”
“It’s…nothing, never mind.” I replied as my stomach roiled. “It was stupid to bring it up.”
I mentally kicked myself as I turned for the exit, my hat practically crushed in the tight grip of my hand. I knew what they said about making assumptions. Why did I think he’d get what I was referring to or that he’d want to discuss it? Had it all been one-sided? The looks, the touches, the conversations…