Total pages in book: 171
Estimated words: 170885 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 854(@200wpm)___ 684(@250wpm)___ 570(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 170885 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 854(@200wpm)___ 684(@250wpm)___ 570(@300wpm)
“Don’t compare him to Clara. I couldn’t care less about her.” I’m losing myself because of him.
“Oh my God,” Glyn breathes out and cups her mouth, but that does nothing to hide her smile. “That day in the coffee shop when Kill said Nikolai is exclusive with someone, could that, by any chance, be you?”
“Yeah.”
“Are you, like, coming out to us, right now? What am I supposed to do? Can I hug you?”
“I’d rather not,” I say, feeling a bit lighter that she’s smiling. That’s good, right?
Cecily takes my hand in hers. “I’m so happy for you, Bran. I feel like a proud mama seeing you find someone you like.”
“Yes! I hated that bitch Clara,” Glyn agrees. “She was such an opportunist. You know, I didn’t want to tell you this, but that night we had a party in the Elites’ mansion, I saw her trying to kiss Lan and she was rubbing herself all over him. He threw her out and asked me not to tell you since it would just hurt your feelings. I despise her so much, I can’t even begin to express it.”
Lan never mentioned that. But then again, he never tells me anything.
And what do you tell him? You locked him out a long time ago.
“You…” I watch them closely. “Don’t think it’s weird that I like a guy after only dating girls all this time?”
“What does gender have to do with it?” Cecily strokes my hand. “I’m just happy you’re happy.”
“Me, too.” Glyn interlinks her arm with mine and leans her head on my shoulder. “Whoever you like doesn’t change who you are. You’ll always be the coolest older brother ever.”
“Best friend in the land of the living.” Cecily scoots her chair over and grabs my other arm.
“Thanks.” My voice catches and I clear my throat. “I’m lucky to have you both.”
Cecily smiles up at me. “So, how long have you been with Nikolai?”
“Yes!” Glyn rests her chin on my shoulder. “We need deets.”
“A couple of months.”
“Wow. You guys really kept it under wraps.” Cecily shakes her head. “I didn’t suspect anything.”
“I kept it under wraps. I am the one who didn’t want to say the words aloud.”
It’s not really about coming out. It’s about everything else I have to admit when I come out.
The reason why I didn’t want to believe how so not normal I am.
“You needed time. It makes sense,” Glyn says. “You were always with girls, so I never really suspected you were bi.”
“I don’t think I’m bi. I’m just gay.” The words flow from my mouth easier than I thought. “Asexual, too. Or I was. I think the right term is demisexual. I can only feel sexual desire toward someone I like.”
“I kind of suspected the ace part.” Cecily smiles. “You were never attracted to anyone, no matter how hot they were. You looked at animals with more affection than you looked at your girlfriends.”
“Animals aren’t gold diggers.” Glyn punches the air. “I want to beat those bitches for using you.”
They didn’t use me. I used them. But that’s not a conversation I’m willing to have.
“I can’t wait to see Mum’s and Dad’s reactions when they find out.” Glyn grins and then pauses. “That is, if you want to tell them?”
“I will.”
“They’re going to flip their shit.”
“In a good or a bad way?”
“Bran, you could literally be an alien and they’ll love you. You’re their favorite.”
“No, I’m not.”
“You totally are. Mum worships you, and Dad loves you so much, he’s always like, Bran did this and Bran did that.” She pauses. “Not sure he’ll like Nikolai, though. He’s a massive menace.”
I wince. “It doesn’t help that he’s Kill’s cousin.”
“Kill can be civilized. Nikolai is…well, not?”
“Why Nikolai?” Cecily asks. “No matter how much I think about it, you guys are worlds apart in character. Where he’s chaotic, you’re organized to a fault. He’s unhinged, you’re methodical. You’re, like, opposites.”
“Maybe that’s why it worked. Besides, he didn’t really leave me much of a choice. He invaded my life and wasn’t budging no matter how much I pushed him away…well, that is, until now.”
“What’s wrong?” Glyn pulls away, frowning. “Please tell me it’s not because of Lan.”
“They fought the other night, right?” Cecily winces. “Jeremy said Nikolai hasn’t been himself this past week.”
“It’s not Lan, it’s me. He didn’t like the fact that I was hesitant.”
“But this whole thing is new for you, Bran. It’s okay to take your time.” Glyn rubs my shoulder.
“Not if it means I could lose him. I think I hurt him whenever I do that, because he believes I’m ashamed of him.”
“Oh.”
“I’m not,” I blurt out quickly. “I just… I can’t help thinking about all the other factors, namely Lan.”
“Ugh. Seriously, you need to get over your fixation on Lan’s reaction to everything you do. I love you, Bran, I really do, but you give him so much leeway for all the shit he does.” Glyn sighs. “He doesn’t even care.”