Total pages in book: 88
Estimated words: 84227 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 421(@200wpm)___ 337(@250wpm)___ 281(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 84227 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 421(@200wpm)___ 337(@250wpm)___ 281(@300wpm)
He loved me. God, why couldn’t he love me the way I wanted him to?
“I’m gay,” I whispered because I’d never said the words out loud before, only in my own head. “I’m gay,” I said again, and God, it felt good, like this weight was suddenly lifted from my chest. I was gay, and it was okay. I liked men, and I loved Chase, and the two most important people in my life, Griff and Chase, would be okay with it. Well, minus the loving-Chase part.
I cried until I fell asleep, right there on Chase’s shoulder. He smelled so good, a light tinge of sweat mixed with cologne and this woodsy scent that was all Chase. I needed more of him, so I rooted my nose around in his neck and inhaled. Still, it wasn’t enough. I wanted to taste him, so I sneaked my tongue out and licked at his flesh.
“Shh, it’s okay, Twerp,” Chase whispered again, and sure, I could have gone without the twerp part, but one couldn’t control their dreams. On some level, I knew I was dreaming, so I kept going, kissing my way up Chase’s flesh, like I’d done so many times before in my fantasies. Only this time, it felt more real.
“Chase, I’ve wanted this for so long.”
“Umm…Kell…”
My body went so tense, I thought it might break apart. Oh God. I wasn’t dreaming. Not fully. I was kissing Chase, licking his neck and inhaling him.
I was going to die.
But then…then I looked down and saw Chase’s hand squeezing the couch pillow, saw the bulge between his legs. He was hard. Chase Hawthorne was hard from what I was doing to him.
“I’m bisexual.”
Chase was bi, and he had an erection from me kissing him.
If there was a gay Jesus, he gave me strength right then. I didn’t know where it came from, but I suddenly knew this was my chance. That if I stopped, I’d regret it for the rest of my life, so I kissed his neck again.
“Please, Chase,” I begged, and he growled, this throaty, sexy, needy growl that made an earthquake go off inside me.
I straddled his lap and wrapped my arms around him, and we were kissing for real then. I felt his stubble against my face, and his tongue in my mouth, and holy motherfucking shit, nothing in the world tasted as good as Chase Hawthorne—the first person I ever kissed.
“We can’t,” Chase said as I kissed his throat again. “Griff will kill me.” He didn’t say he didn’t want me, only that Griff would be upset.
“Griff doesn’t have to know. I’m an adult, Chase. He’s not my keeper.”
Then Chase was kissing me again, and his arms wrapped around me, squeezing me tight. It was all my favorite things in life, every good memory combined in this one moment in time.
I moved on his lap and felt his erection against me. His hands slid down, and he grabbed my waist, squeezing my hips, his fingers digging in. He growled again, and I swallowed it and moved more, and it was everything but still not enough. This was my one chance with Chase, and I wanted it all.
I climbed off him, lay on the couch, and went for his shorts.
He grabbed my wrist. “Hey, Twerp. Kissing is one thing. I think that’s a little much.”
“Please.” I leaned down and rubbed my face against his length. He thrust against me, and his hand fell away. He was breathing heavily, and then I had his dick out, and holy fuck, Chase had a huge cock. It was thick and long and he smelled so damn good. When I had him in my mouth, it was like the fucking angels sang.
His hand was in my hair, and he was whispering my name over and over. I was making Chase feel that way. Me. I was pleasuring him and causing those hoarse sounds to pull from the back of his throat.
“I’m gonna come, Kell. Fuck, I’m gonna come.”
But I didn’t pull off, and he shot in my mouth. Not gonna say it tasted good. In fact, I gagged a little, but still. I swallowed every drop, my orgasm slamming into me, making me dizzy and like I was flying as I came in my shorts.
“I…uh…should return the favor,” Chase said.
The favor. Those words made me feel so cold, but what did I expect? That he was suddenly going to tell me he loved me? That he’d dreamed of this moment with me? Yeah, right. This was a favor. An orgasm. That was it.
“Whatever. It’s fine. I finished already.”
“Fuck,” Chase gritted out, his head dropping back against the couch. “I can’t believe I did that.”
He couldn’t believe he did that? Couldn’t believe he enjoyed me? Dizziness made my brain swim, and my hands tightened into fists. “Fuck you!” I shouted, pushing away from him.