Total pages in book: 62
Estimated words: 58840 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 294(@200wpm)___ 235(@250wpm)___ 196(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 58840 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 294(@200wpm)___ 235(@250wpm)___ 196(@300wpm)
When he recovers, he lathers me up like it’s his job to make sure every speck of my skin is clean. As he rinses me off, he holds me close, our bodies warm and slippery against each other under the spray. I usually consider showering just another daily chore, but Owen makes it a highlight.
Today, I sit on Zane’s lap as we eat our breakfast sandwiches. “Last leg of the tour tonight. Are you excited?” I ask.
“Can’t say I want it to end,” Zane says. The other guys voice their agreement through bites of food.
“Maybe we can request not to go on tour again, though,” Jordan says. “Another group of dancers can go, and that way you won’t be our boss, and it won’t be breaking rules for us to be together.”
“If I stay on as tour manager, I’ll be gone all the time, and I won’t see you anyway.”
“You’ll be back once a week, or a couple of times a month,” Owen says, but I give him a look. I think we know that’s not going to be enough. Relationships are already difficult, even when you see each other regularly; a long distance one would be doomed even faster.
“I wonder if there are any other job opportunities at the club that wouldn’t be a step backward? Maybe I’ll tell them that touring wasn’t for me. Maybe I could at least go back to the front desk.” Even as I say this, I realize I don’t like the idea. The front desk would be a step back in pay, and am I really going to do that for men I’ve known for a week?
“If you do that, then we’ll stop touring, and that way we can see each other all the time,” Colin says.
They make it sound easy, but it’s not. There are too many challenges. Sacrifices and setbacks. It would be difficult even if we could put the job situation aside, which we can’t.
I’m still thinking about it on the van, on the way to our last show venue. The scenery is rushing by, and it starts to feel like a countdown, like sand funneling through an hourglass. I just can’t see a way for this to work.
I’m mostly staring out the window without really focusing on anything, but off the highway as we head to a fuel stop, a little blue house catches my eye. It’s a cottage, set back from the road, with a sweet little yard surrounded by a fence threaded with vines. It looks an awful lot like the house I’m buying.
Like the house I’m hoping to buy.
The one with the deal that will fall through if my income changes. If I lose my job.
I’m still staring at it when a billboard obstructs my view. The sign may as well say, “Come to your senses, Brittany!” because that’s what I need to do.
What have I been thinking? Am I really considering giving up my new job, the best job I’ve ever had, for a relationship, even though every relationship I’ve ever been in has crashed and burned like the finale of a high-budget action movie?
I gave up on relationships for a reason, and I need to remember that. They don’t work, not for me. And it would be extra unlikely that a relationship would work with four men, when I haven’t even been able to work things out with one. Not to mention that these are four men who antagonized me, right up until they started sleeping with me.
I glance in their direction, needing to look at them while I think these thoughts. Needing to know that I’ll have the strength to follow through with making the right decisions.
Owen’s looking back at me from across the van, even though I’d have sworn he was sleeping just a few minutes ago. Zane’s looking too, and as if they sense something, Colin and Jordan stop their conversation and look my way as well.
Their faces tell me that they can see that something’s wrong.
Jordan, who’s in one of the closest seats, gets up and comes over. “What’s wrong?”
“I’ll talk to you later. To all of you. I don’t want to —” I tilt my head to gesture toward the divider behind me, to where Toad is sitting. Of course, I could go back and sit near the men and talk to them with relative privacy there, but this isn’t the place to get into the conversation that I need to have with them.
Jordan nods, squeezes my thigh, and gives me a quick kiss, since Toad can’t see us in this spot.
Fuck, this is going to be hard.
32
OWEN
Jordan turns back to us with a dark expression. Whatever Brittany said to him wasn’t good.
“What’s going on?” Colin asks him.
Jordan shrugs. “She’ll talk to us later.”
“That doesn’t sound good,” Zane mutters unnecessarily.