Total pages in book: 138
Estimated words: 129179 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 646(@200wpm)___ 517(@250wpm)___ 431(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 129179 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 646(@200wpm)___ 517(@250wpm)___ 431(@300wpm)
“Harrison’s friend Mike’s new secretary is coming tomorrow,” she announced while I belted Emmett into his car seat. “She’s adorable and super single.”
Ding, ding, ding. My sister was nothing if not reliable. I smirked and glanced back at her over my shoulder at her. “You realize you’re about as subtle as a wrecking crew, right?”
She shrugged. “I’m through trying to be subtle—I’m worried about you,” she replied sternly. “It’s insane to me that you don’t date. I don’t want you to end up alone, Ry.”
“I like being alone, JJ,” I reminded her.
“Come on, Ry, it’s been years,” she huffed. “You have to miss…”
Little ears were listening, so JJ spelled out the word S-E-X. I straightened up from belting Emmett in and set my arm on the hood of the car as I rolled my eyes at my sister.
“And yet I really don’t.”
I wasn’t lying, either. I didn’t miss it. Not at all.
“That’s just wrong,” she argued. “You’re twenty-eight but you act ninety. No red-blooded male just forgets about S-E-X.”
“I haven’t forgotten about it,” I answered. (actually, I thought maybe I had, for all intents and purposes, but I just didn’t care.)
“It’s only been like…”
I trailed off, frowning as I tried to remember how long it had been. Yep. I actually had forgotten. My career was my life and I put it ahead of everything but my sister and her family. Otherwise, I lived to work and worked to live. There was no room for anything else.
“Four years,” JJ provided in exasperation.
I tapped my fingers against the roof of the car and shrugged. “It’s not right to date and give people an idea of things that are never going to happen. I’m never getting married or having kids and meaningless S-E-X isn’t enjoyable at all.”
It really wasn’t, and I was somewhat of an expert on it seeing as I’d never had sex with anyone I felt connected to. I’d lost my virginity my senior year in college to someone I’d dated for a short period of time. The feelings weren’t there and the sex was lackluster. Since then, I’d had a grand total of three partners. In my opinion there was almost nothing worse than being skin to skin with someone you didn’t have feelings for. I found it uncomfortable and, to be completely honest, a bit depressing.
JJ said my walls were built to high and I had to acknowledge that she wasn’t necessarily wrong. I knew a lot of it had to do with my frame of mind—mainly that I didn’t want children. The chance of finding someone who wanted the same things I did was about a million to one, so I kept my heart protected because it was easier. The worst thing would’ve been to develop feelings for someone who wanted a family. I had never once felt the desire to be a father and that was a big deal to me. I believed being a parent was something you should want with your whole heart. If you didn’t feel it, having children was downright cruel. I was a lot of things, but cruel wasn’t one of them.
“You’re too firm about that meaningless thing,” Jamie argued. “At least it would be human contact. Dating your fist isn’t normal.”
“I don’t date my fist,” I answered stiffly.
I didn’t, either. In fact, I hadn’t taken myself in hand for months, maybe even as long as a year. I knew my lack of sexual interest was due to my having a low sex drive. In my opinion, there were worse things in life than not banging my way through the town or jerking it incessantly.
“What’s that mean?” Emmett called out from the backseat. “Unca Ry dates his fist?”
I pursed my lips to keep from laughing out loud as my sister gaped at her son.
“Emmett!” She scolded. “That’s not what I said. Don’t listen to adult conversations.”
“Yeah it is. The door’s open, Mommy,” he pointed out with a giggle. “I has good ears.”
“Well, I mean… good Lord!” Jamie sputtered and glared at me before looking back to Emmett. “Your ears heard wrong, honey. That’s not what I said.”
“Sure, Mommy. Whatever you say,” Emmett said cheerfully. “Can me go get my bots cake now? Your talkin’ is boring.”
I wanted to high-five my nephew right then. If he hadn’t put the kibosh on it, my sister would’ve talked my ear off for an hour about potential fix-ups. Jamie was a machine where I was concerned. No matter what I said she maintained an opinion that it was an absolute abomination that I wasn’t out searching for someone to plant my seed in.
Emmett chattered the whole way to the bakery about his party and his friends at school, and I laughed a lot at his funny stories. I’d never have any of my own, but I adored my sister’s children. They were all amazing, hilarious and so damn smart.