Total pages in book: 156
Estimated words: 145676 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 728(@200wpm)___ 583(@250wpm)___ 486(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 145676 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 728(@200wpm)___ 583(@250wpm)___ 486(@300wpm)
He’d always been too serious—reserved and analytical. At least, that was what he’d been accused of while growing up. He supposed he got those traits from his daddy—Kane—which, oddly enough, was the reason he’d allowed himself to delve into the spiritual side of life.
To be so much like his daddy, yet share none of his DNA, made him curious. But accepting something he couldn’t see, touch, or study, went against all his training and had proved a hard pill to swallow. He’d held a beating heart in his hand, and in that moment, he’d been the only thing that stood between his patient’s life and their death.
Yet, there had to be more to life than just the exactness of science. A metaphysical something that required him to suspend his incessant need for facts. That wasn’t an easy concept for him, but the thought of something more helped him process all this heavy weight holding him down, suffocating the very life from him.
Surely there had to be more to life. More for his fathers. Something bigger than all of this. He had to cling to the hope, or he would most certainly drown in all his confusion. Therein lay his quandary. He didn’t know what to believe or where to find the truth. His whole heart wanted him to believe in something his intellect told him couldn’t exist.
Life moved so fast, so aggressively and harshly that he had become lost somewhere in the turbulence, searching for a life preserver. At least he was practicing medicine again. Robert’s mind drifted to the feathers. Who would have ever thought his path back to medicine would come by way of a hospital in Germany? Robert slowed his steps, thinking about his dad—Avery—and his last words to him. They weren’t anything close to the last words he’d shared with his sister, Autumn, who was a carbon copy of their father. His dad had used the tone that always made Robert listen, a voice that echoed through his head even now.
“I’m proud of you, Robert, and I couldn’t have asked for a better son. You’re so much like your daddy, so serious all the time. Relax, be open for what life has to offer. Don’t lose yourself in the science of things. It’s okay to chase feathers in the wind, son. But remember… It’s not enough to have the feathers. You must dare to fly.”
Feathers… It was silly how he clung to such a simple notion. Robert slowed to a walk and wiped his brow with his shirt sleeve. Hope, self-preservation, and one of his father’s favorite quotes by Cass Van Krah were the reason he was here in Germany in the first place.
A little over a month ago, he had met Autumn at their childhood home in Stillwater, Minnesota. It had taken him months to even agree to return. There was so much work ahead of them to finalize the estate. Except Robert never really understood why he needed to be present. His sister was an attorney and the executrix. It made sense to him that she’d just handle it all. She was efficient and fair. Besides, Robert didn’t care about the inheritance. Autumn could have it all. He was lost in this deep sense of betrayal and he carried so much guilt for going against Autumn at the end of their daddy’s life. He should have listened. Instead, he’d let his sick father dictate his own care, allowing him to stay in his home even when he was so clearly declining a little more every single day.
Shit, he’d blown it when it mattered the most. He’d all but killed his father by not insisting on professional medical care sooner. He was a surgeon. Medicine was his life. How had he let this happen?
Stop. Nothing good would come from rehashing all of this again. Believe in the possibility, it’s your only hope. Believe in destiny and fate and a connection so deep one couldn’t live without the other. Believe that the two people who showed you what extraordinary love truly meant were now together in the heavens.
Believe your fathers were truly each one’s other halves and were only complete when together. Accept the end was predetermined.
But he wasn’t certain he believed it—any of it. His innate logic wanted to ruin the only thing that offered him comfort and hope.
“It could be true,” he whispered against the sadness building in his heart, assuring himself the blurry vision was more from perspiration and humidity than tears forming in his eyes. He used the bottom of his T-shirt to wipe away the sweat on his brow as he looked around to see how far he’d run. It was hard to tell from the layout of the building.
Robert let out a deep sigh. Man, he missed his dad’s middle of the night conversations. He could use one right now. Just him and his dad and the quiet of the early morning hour. Avery had a way of explaining and engaging Robert, pulling him from his tunnel vision. Would his dad be proud of him for being in Germany? Avery always believed in humanity and giving back to the world that had given him so much.