Total pages in book: 156
Estimated words: 145676 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 728(@200wpm)___ 583(@250wpm)___ 486(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 145676 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 728(@200wpm)___ 583(@250wpm)___ 486(@300wpm)
Landon took a deep breath, not really questioning why he was laying out the locked away secrets of his life, and the fairytales he believed in. “The true meaning to Vice President Adams’s life was his husband. I felt their connection in every word the man wrote. Then, when I stood watch with you and your father overnight, seeing him sit for hours holding onto the casket, not wanting to let his husband go—I saw the strength of their love, and the depth of their bond, with my own eyes. The next morning, I left as a different man. Even in death, the love between those two men couldn’t be denied. Your parents helped me realize everyone deserves a love that powerful.”
Landon had so much emotion driving his words that he could feel the tears welling in his eyes and forced himself to shut his mouth, to stop the insane information dump he was giving, and swallowed the lump threatening to clog his throat.
Landon wasn’t the only one emotional. Dr. Adams’s eyes were red and tear-filled. He bent, lowering his head as he dug his finger and thumb into his eyes, not saying a single word to what Landon had just confessed.
“Let me be there for you like you’ve been here for me. Tell me why you’re really here. I know you’re hurting over your fathers’ deaths…” Landon started, trying to help in any way he could. Dr. Adams sat up, and they stared at one another until the doctor dropped his gaze to his lap. His face scrunched in intense pain. His skilled hands were moving over each other. Not necessarily wringing, but probably as close to it as this fine man ever got.
“You’re my patient,” Dr. Adams started, lifting his head to look at Landon, definitely shying away from him.
“Stop the bullshit, Doc. Just say what’s on your mind. You’re safe with me, and no one can hear us out here,” he encouraged.
Dr. Adams’s body shuddered as his head hung, his tone sounding shamed. “I’m responsible.”
“Responsible? For what?” Landon’s mind raced, trying to understand. The deep pain was evident in the rawness of the doctor’s voice. It showed physically when his body seemed to crumple in front of him like the man was shouldering the weight of the world.
“I did it.” Dr. Adams scrubbed a hand down the length of his face. “I let my father die. I save strangers’ lives for a living, but I let my father wither away to nothing when I had the power to help him.”
Landon was so confused. He grappled with the little bit he knew about Avery Adams’s death. “I thought he had heart disease. He lived twenty years longer than his father or grandfather…”
“No, not him. My daddy—Kane. He was in my care when he died. Autumn had wanted him in the hospital weeks before. She and I had a huge fight a couple of days before he died, but I gave into my daddy’s wishes. I stayed with him at his home. I was so arrogant. I thought I’d be able to handle the situation. He needed care, more care than I could provide at home. I should’ve forced him to see a psychologist months before he died. I knew he’d given up. He missed my dad so much.” There was deep anguish and pain in those blue eyes. Landon had no choice but to reach out and take the man’s shaking hand in his. He gave a gentle squeeze for reassurance. “Why did I so blatantly disregard his health? Even when I finally got him to agree to go to the hospital, he talked me into stopping by the cemetery. Why would I have ever allowed something like that to happen?”
“Doc, listen to me,” Landon said, hurting for this man’s immense pain. “There was nothing that was gonna keep Kane Adams alive. I saw it the night I stood watch. Your father died the day his husband died. His body lasted longer than I thought it would. He didn’t want to live without your dad. His purpose and reason was gone the day Vice President Adams died.”
There was a helplessness on the doctor’s face as he clutched Landon’s hand and lifted his eyes, searching Landon’s face. “I’ve lived an intellectual life. I believe in science. These decisions I’ve made make no sense to me. I know better than to believe in the mystical, but I can’t let go of all this guilt.” Tears gathered and spilled down the doctor’s cheeks, breaking Landon’s heart in two. “I let my parents down and I can’t get past it.”
Landon racked his brain, desperately trying to find the right words to help this fine man’s unbearable grief. “I promise you didn’t let them down. It was always going to end for them just like it did. I know in my heart you made the last months of your father’s life better. You need to understand that and let it be enough.”