Total pages in book: 114
Estimated words: 103918 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 520(@200wpm)___ 416(@250wpm)___ 346(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 103918 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 520(@200wpm)___ 416(@250wpm)___ 346(@300wpm)
After a few days, I'd started counting the steps between things. I knew it was twenty-six steps from the living room couch to the microwave. From there it was thirty-one steps to the bathroom. Thankfully, I had a pretty good memory, so it was easy to tuck away all the different counts and remember them for when I wanted to get somewhere. I wasn't sure how I'd apply that to my apartment back in Los Angeles, considering how much bigger it was, but at least I knew it was possible.
Cooking was the one thing I hadn't really given any thought to trying—not cooking on the stove, anyway. I'd made most of the food I'd eaten in the microwave and while it hadn't tasted particularly good, I'd at least done it by myself. The snag had been when I'd run out of food and hadn't arranged more quickly to have my driver, Andre, bring me more. I knew I probably should've paid the exorbitant fee to have Andre stay in Fisher Cove so he'd be at my beck and call, but that had been a certain level of dependence that I hadn't wanted to rely on.
I hadn't even considered calling Gideon after he’d dropped me off. I'd already imposed on the man so much and it hadn't been something I'd wanted to repeat. But when he’d shown up the very next day, I'd been elated. I’d actually stood in the kitchen near the front door so I could let the man in, but when there had been no knock and I'd heard the sound of his engine disappearing in the distance, I'd been bereft. I'd written it off to him being in a rush, but then when it had happened again that night and the next day and the day after, I’d accepted that he wasn't interested in seeing me. All he wanted was to do his job as caretaker of the cabin.
But this morning when my blood sugar had started to go above normal for me, I’d realized I didn't have a lot of options and I'd made that call to Gideon.
And here I was sitting next to a virtual stranger and wondering how I'd gone from welcoming the silence of Birch Cabin to craving the company of a man I knew so little about.
My thoughts occupied most of the drive into town. It wasn't until Gideon pulled the truck to a stop and then came around it to help me out that my confidence started to crumble. I'd been riding the high of realizing how simple it was to count the steps between locations in my cabin, and I’d just thought that somehow I could apply that same thing to an outing and it would be like I was almost normal. But the second I stepped foot on the hard pavement, I felt completely disoriented.
And utterly helpless.
Were there, even now, people watching me? Were they wondering what had happened to me even as they felt sorry for me?
I tried to listen for hushed whispers but heard nothing beyond the occasional car passing. There were other sounds too, but I just couldn’t identify any of them.
"Merv's is across the street," Gideon said as he took my arm and pulled me forward, presumably so he could shut the truck’s door. Then his hand disappeared from my arm and complete and utter panic set in. Had he left? Had he just assumed I'd be okay on my own and was planning to meet me back at the truck? What if he’d tired of me and was just going to drive off and leave me there? I had my phone with me, but what good would it do? Who would I call? Did such a small town even have a police force?
I wanted to reach out to see if Gideon's truck was still there. Logically, I knew it had to be because I hadn't heard the engine fire up, but when I put my hand out, the only thing that greeted it was air. I tried calling Gideon's name, but it got stuck in my throat.
My quickly closing-up throat.
I tried drawing in some oxygen, but it felt like nothing was getting through. My heart was racing in my chest and my limbs felt too heavy for my body.
"Hey… hey," I heard Gideon say and I nearly let out a sob of relief when his fingers closed around my upper arms. "I'm here, Lex. I'm here," I heard him say. There was a dark shape in front of me which I assumed was Gideon, but it didn't really matter. I was frozen in place, so even if I wanted to hug him, I couldn't.
"Lex, I need you to slow your breathing," Gideon said. "Just like we did in my house that first day, remember?"
My mind felt like it was going a million miles an hour. I wanted to tell him so and explain that there was no way I could count, let alone do anything else, but I’d gone completely mute. I was sure that in a matter of seconds, I'd be lying passed out on the ground.