Total pages in book: 86
Estimated words: 85484 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 427(@200wpm)___ 342(@250wpm)___ 285(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 85484 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 427(@200wpm)___ 342(@250wpm)___ 285(@300wpm)
She snorts.
“I hit the alarm three times this morning, Muggers screwed up my latte, and my hair looks like this.” I point at my head. “I woke up emotional, which makes me ragey itself because emotions are inconvenient and make me feel weak.”
Kerissa rubs a hand against her forehead. “This does not bode well for Chuck.”
My teeth clench as I remember the smarmy look the jerk gave me.
“So we’re going back and forth about our ideas, right? The whole office is in the conference room listening to us weigh the pros and cons of our proposals. I wrap up my little impromptu presentation—which I nailed, by the way. He must’ve felt threatened or something because he leaned back in his chair, his arms behind his head like he’s proudly displaying his sweat stains in his armpits, and says”—I pause to channel my inner Chuck voice— “‘I’d like to point out that we’re taking relationship advice from a woman who has no verifiable experience with them.’”
The top of my head might blow up.
“He did not,” Kerissa says, eyes wide.
“Everyone was staring at me. I had flashbacks from high school when everyone found out about my mom’s chandelier debacle. I just opened my mouth and spewed … I don’t even know what I said, Kerissa. I was so pissed off. Something about being touched he pays so much attention to my private life but that I had been married before.” I stop to drag in a hasty breath. “Then, because I’m petty and I know from office gossip that he and his wife are having problems, I said that at least I knew when to walk away, unlike others who live a loveless life in misery.”
Her jaw drops.
“Not my proudest moment,” I say, shifting in my seat.
“Well, silver lining—at least you put it in past tense. You could’ve said you are married. That would’ve been way more awkward.”
I stare at her.
“What? I’m trying to help here,” she says.
“What would’ve helped is if you’d gone to work with me and clamped a hand over my mouth. Because everyone started jabbering about how they didn’t know that about me. I stood there with red freaking cheeks, constructing a fake marriage that we ended after a couple of years when we realized it wasn’t right for us. Oh—he’s still smitten with me, too, because why not? If you’re creating an ex-husband, you might as well make him worth the fake marriage, right?”
Kerissa chuckles as I groan.
It’s fine. Everything is going to be fine.
Hannah, our server, slides up to the table. A wad of pink gum snaps between her teeth.
I rest back against my chair and take a long, deep breath. I had big plans for today after work, including a walk on the beach and making a cold tomato soup with tarragon crème fraîche for my new neighbor. It’s been a long time since I made something for anyone besides Kerissa, and she has the palate of a child. I was excited to take my sweet new friend a bowl of soup and listen to her stories about years gone by.
“You ladies look like you’re in the middle of a serious conversation, but I wanted to make sure you don’t need anything else,” Hannah says.
Kerissa cups her chin in her hand and smiles at Hannah. “I’m fine. Pippa told her coworkers that she was married. For the record, she’s never sniffed a wedding veil.”
“I’m sitting right here.”
“I know,” Kerissa says. “I saved you the trouble of explaining. You’re welcome.”
Hannah grins. “That sounds like a prickly situation.”
“How do you mean?” I ask, fiddling with my straw.
“Well, don’t you work at a matchmaking company in Lakely?”
I nod.
“What if someone asks who you were married to?” she asks. “What do you say then? He’s just someone from out of town? Because Lakely is a good forty-five minutes from here, and while there’s not tons of crossover, someone might ask just to see if they know them.”
I know. Dammit.
Kerissa sits up and laughs. “No, because that would’ve been too easy. She told them that she has dinner with him once a month.”
I glare at her. “I said sometimes, not once a month.” I shrug. “He still loves me. I can’t help it. I’m lovable.”
Kerissa rolls her eyes.
“I’m sure you are,” Hannah says, cackling. “But I think you should plot out the rest of your story before you return to work tomorrow. You don’t want to be caught with your pants down … unless your ex-husband is coming around. Maybe he was good in bed.”
“He was. I might’ve mentioned that too.”
Kerissa and Hannah laugh at the heat in my cheeks.
“You both suck,” I say, joining in the laughter.
“I’m with you on this,” Kerissa tells Hannah. “I told her she needs to find a fake ex-husband to have on hand just in case. I know people who have done this kind of thing, and it worked out very, very well.”