Total pages in book: 105
Estimated words: 100301 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 502(@200wpm)___ 401(@250wpm)___ 334(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 100301 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 502(@200wpm)___ 401(@250wpm)___ 334(@300wpm)
“Because they still fucking let me go.”
“Yes, I gathered that much. It’s never fun to get fired, but I’m sure it’s because they know you’re leaving anyway, and hours have been slower, correct?” When he nodded, I continued. “Tell me why it bothers you so much.”
Ian sighed, buried his face in Jordan’s neck. “It’s stupid.”
“It’s not stupid if it’s how you feel, pup. Our feelings are always valid, even when they’re not comfortable or realistic.”
Our eyes met, held. Ian’s hand stroked up and down Jordan’s back as he tested me, and I waited him out. A minute or so later, he said, “It makes me feel unwanted, like there’s something wrong with me. I hate it because it’s not like I care what those people think of me. They don’t matter to me, not really, and yeah, I was gonna leave anyway, but…I still feel like it means there’s something wrong with me. I don’t do well with feeling left or unwanted.”
Yet he’d felt like that many times in his life, hadn’t he? When his mother left him, from foster parents, even from Finley, though that wasn’t actually the case with his friend.
“We want you,” Jordan told him, and damned if Ian didn’t hold him tighter.
“There’s nothing personal about what happened today. There’s nothing unlovable about you, stubborn boy. Jordan is right. We want you. We want you very much. You’re so good for us. You help me take care of Jordan. You serve me so well, and today you’re going to get to see how much we want you, how much you take care of us.”
“I…” Ian started. “I want you both too. I want to be good for you, but I’m scared I’m not. Like I’m a lot of work. I’m not as good at it as I should be; it’s harder for me to let go.”
“We’re only asking for what you can give us. It’s not about everyone doing it the same or giving in the same ways. The beauty in this, in what we do, is Jordan allowing us inside in the way that works best for him, and you doing the same. It’s in giving yourself the best way you know how and challenging yourself. And when you do, it’s beautiful.”
I stepped closer to them, put an arm around each of my boys. I lashed my tongue over Ian’s lips, then Jordan’s, and they understood what I wanted. They opened up for me, a messy three-way kiss with tongues and noises and hunger and need. There was giving and taking and sinking into this moment where we tasted each other and let our guards down.
“We are going to unravel you tonight, stubborn boy, and you’re going to give yourself to us, won’t you?”
Ian gasped. “Yes…yes, Sir.”
“Good boy.” I brushed the wet hair back from Jordan’s face and added, “I’m so blessed to have you both.”
He bit his bottom lip. “Thank you, Daddy.”
“You’re welcome, kitten.” This time, I danced my fingers over Ian’s cheek. “Are you okay?”
“Yes.”
“And you understand what I’m saying to you? You’re ours, and you’ll give yourself to us today.”
“I understand,” Ian replied.
“Good. Now let’s all relax a little bit. We’ll swim and then head inside so Jordan and I can take what’s ours.”
I saw Ian swallow, like a knot sliding down his throat. “Yes, Sir.”
CHAPTER TWENTY-EIGHT
Ian
I knew what David was doing, and I appreciated it.
He was letting me clear the tangled mess of my thoughts before he cut me open so he and Jordan could examine everything inside me.
And I was going to let them.
Maybe, just maybe, I wanted it.
We laughed and played together in the water like we didn’t have a care in the world. Jordan and I were naked while David wasn’t, and as nervous as I was earlier in the evening, there was something freeing about it too.
I was having fun, when just a little while earlier I’d felt alone, so fucking alone and unwanted. Now Jordan and I ganged up on David and kissed underwater. It was perfect and scary, and I wanted so much to hold on tightly but was afraid to get too comfortable. No matter how good it felt, I didn’t think it would last. People always got tired of me sooner or later. Even my own mom did.
Eventually, David said, “Let’s get out. You can both go upstairs and dry off. Jordan, put on a pair of loose shorts or sweats. Ian, I’d like you to stay naked, please.”
A small burst of panic flared in my chest. It was so weird that I’d never had a problem being naked around people I’d had sex with, but being naked while David and Jordan were clothed, which I was assuming was David’s plan, was like nothing I’d ever experienced. Jordan was the exhibitionist, not me. Still, after Sunshine’s, “Yes, Daddy,” I added my own, “Yes, Sir.”