Total pages in book: 67
Estimated words: 63100 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 316(@200wpm)___ 252(@250wpm)___ 210(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 63100 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 316(@200wpm)___ 252(@250wpm)___ 210(@300wpm)
I lie there until the sun begins to rise, Austin’s breath has evened out, and his hand has stopped moving over me. Rolling over, I slowly slip out of his arms, not even giving myself a chance to look at him one last time before I go to the closet and pull one of his shirts off the shelf. I slip it on over my head then find my sweats, pulling them on before making my way quietly out of the room, shutting the door behind me.
The endless stream of tears hasn’t let up since last night, and I try to fight them back as I head out to my car, but I can barely see as I start my engine and drive back through town. When I reach my parents’ house, I physically have to hold myself together as I go inside. Shutting the door, my legs give out, so I roll myself into a ball on the floor and cry.
Waking up, it takes a moment to realize I’m lying on the floor and that there is someone knocking on the door. Getting to my feet, I pull the door open a crack and look outside, coming face-to-face with a woman I don’t recognize.
“Lea?” she says, looking concerned.
“Can I help you?”
“I’m Elza. I work for Mr. Douglas. I’ve been trying to get ahold of you, but I haven’t been able to reach you by phone since we last spoke, so I wanted to stop by and see if I could catch you at home.”
Home? I’m not home. My home is with Austin, I think, feeling a fresh wave of tears fill my eyes.
“If it’s too much, I can come back another time,” she says softly, studying my tear-stained face.
“No, please, it’s okay.” I move back from the door as she enters, then lead her into the living room, sitting across from her on the chair.
“There isn’t much to go over.” She smiles, pulling out a folder, and begins going over my mom’s assets and information about the house.
I don’t even really hear her as she talks. I need to go back to Austin. Even if I was told the future and found out he would die tomorrow, I would want to spend every minute with him that I can. I can’t live without him.
“There is also a letter from your mom,” she says, and my eyes finally focus on her.
“A letter?”
“Yes, sorry, I didn’t know about it until this morning when I gathered your stuff together. If I had known, I would have sent this stuff in the mail,” she apologizes as she hands me a white envelope with my name scrolled across the front in my mom’s handwriting.
“It’s okay,” I mutter, unable to look away from envelope in my hands.
“If you need anything, don’t be afraid to call,” she says, and I nod, holding the letter to my chest as I follow behind her to the door.
“Thank you, Elza.”
She looks at me over her shoulder and smiles, muttering a goodbye as I close the door behind her. Leaning back against the door I pull the envelope open, carefully removing the letter and unfolding it.
My dear, beautiful girl,
If you’re reading this, it means my time here is over and I’ve moved on to my next adventure.
I wish we’d had more time. That I would have had more time to tell you how proud I am of you, how amazed I am by the woman you’ve become. That every day I spent with you, I realized I had done something right while I was alive.
I also want to apologize; I want to tell you how sorry I am for not being stronger when you needed me to be. When your dad died, half of me died with him. From that day on, I tried to be courageous, but I was so scared that I let that feeling suffocate me.
I didn’t want to see you suffer the same fate as me. I didn’t want to have to look into your eyes if something happened to Austin, so I did what I thought was right. I did what my heart told me to do.
I know the kind of man Austin is, and I know he probably hasn’t told you what I did, because he doesn’t want you to hate me, but I lied to you both. I let my own fears hurt you more than losing him ever could have.
Austin looked for you, honey. He never stopped. Lord knows I threatened him to stay away, but he always came back, begging me to tell him where you were. He never stopped, until I told him you moved on, that you were happy without him and he needed to find his own happiness.
That day, I saw a light go off in his eyes, the same light I saw extinguished in yours when I told you the same thing.