Total pages in book: 150
Estimated words: 136791 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 684(@200wpm)___ 547(@250wpm)___ 456(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 136791 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 684(@200wpm)___ 547(@250wpm)___ 456(@300wpm)
I bury my face in his throat and bawl like a baby.
He holds me on his lap for a long time, talking to Titan. When I finally manage to stop crying, I talk to him too. I tell him about Kaleo and how Cade turned into a badass. I tell him about my life and how I'm looking forward to the future for the first time in a long time.
"Thank you for always trying to take care of me," I whisper to him. "Part of me will always feel like it's my fault you got caught up with Kaleo, but I know you just wanted the best for me. Thank you, big brother." I press my hand to my lips and then press it to his headstone.
"Mama, I want you to know I'm going to be okay now," I whisper to her. "I promise you that I'll never stop fighting for myself and for Cade."
"And when she can't fight, I'll fight for her," Cade vows, using his thumbs to wipe away my tears. "I'll love her enough for both of us when she forgets to love herself. You don't have to worry about her anymore, Jana. I've got her now, and I'm not ever letting her go."
His sweet words send more tears down my face.
We sit there for another hour, just talking to my mom and Titan. Sometimes, we cry. Other times, we laugh. But when Cade puts me on my feet a little bit later and presses his lips to my forehead, I feel lighter than I have since the day they died.
"Wait for me in the car, baby girl," he murmurs, turning me toward the rental parked in the grass a few yards away. "I need to have a private conversation with Titan."
I study his expression for a moment—take in the determination in his blue-gray eyes and the confident set of his shoulders—and then I nod.
I press another kiss to Titan's headstone and then to my mom's. Cade watches me as I straighten the flowers and add the ones we brought today to the vases, and then I head to the car so he can say whatever he needs to say to my brother in private. Whatever he has to say is important to him, but I know he'll tell me if I ask. He always gives me what I want. And all I've ever wanted was him.
He's all I will ever want.
Chapter Twenty-Seven
Cade
Iwatch January until she makes it to the car, and then I turn back to Titan's grave. Seeing the headstone with his name on it damn near broke me, but my girl was there to hold me together, just like she's been doing for most of my life.
"Hey man," I whisper to Titan and then clear my throat. "When I put a ring on her finger before, I never asked for your permission. I was pissed off and stubborn as hell, so I put that ring on her finger and didn't give a damn if I had your blessing or not. But I'm asking for it now." My gaze drifts from his grave to Jana's. "I promise you that I will be by her side until I take my last breath. No one will ever love her more than I do or cherish her more than I will. I won't let you down again. I won't disappoint you this time. I'll watch over our girl and keep her safe so you can rest easy, brother."
I rake a hand through my hair and exhale. "So if you're cool with me marrying your sister, I could use a sign or something. I'm not really sure how this works. Just don't show up in my bedroom and rattle the doorknobs or some stupid shit like that in the middle of the night, okay? You'd just freak her the fuck out and probably see her naked. No disrespect because you're her brother, but I'll fuck you up if you see her naked…and I don't know how the fuck to fight a ghost, so you're just going to have to give me this one, okay?
"Send me a rainbow or something, I guess? Fuck." I huff out a breath. "I don't even know what the fuck I'm saying. Just…I want to marry your sister, and I need to know you're good with it. And I need you to know that I'll never leave her side. I'll never disappoint you again. I will never hurt her again." I bump my fist gently against his headstone and then lay a kiss on Jana's. "We're going to be okay now," I promise them both. "You'll see."
I linger for another moment like I expect Titan's heavenly voice to come floating down to tell me to keep my hands off his baby sister, but it doesn't. I'm not sure if that's a good thing or not, but at least he didn't ask God to strike me down with lightning or some shit, so I guess that's good enough for now.