Total pages in book: 70
Estimated words: 66672 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 333(@200wpm)___ 267(@250wpm)___ 222(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 66672 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 333(@200wpm)___ 267(@250wpm)___ 222(@300wpm)
Ilona flushed, an expression of discomfort and shame flickering over her face. She didn’t have to say anything; her face said it all.
“I see,” Devlin said.
“The queen knows,” Ilona said uncomfortably. “And she has a lover, too. I know it doesn’t excuse me. You’re right to judge me—I’m judging myself, Devlin.” Pressing her knuckles against her eyes, she swallowed. “But… but you have no idea what it’s like to fight the pull toward your mate. It’s like fighting gravity. It’s impossible. No matter how strong your mind is, the flesh is weak. The heart is weaker yet.”
Devlin frowned and averted his gaze.
“What is it?” Ilona said, touching his hand.
“It’s nothing.”
“You are not being honest. I know you, my darling.”
Suppressing the urge to snap at her that she didn’t know him, Devlin pinched the bridge of his nose. Breathed in. “It’s nothing,” he repeated, getting to his feet. “I just remembered that I have somewhere to be.”
He walked toward the door, but her voice stopped him.
“Do you hate me?” she said, her lovely voice cracking.
Devlin looked back at her. Her eyes were glistening with tears, her hands trembling before she wrapped her arms around herself. She looked small, vulnerable, and broken.
Sighing, Devlin walked back to her and pulled her against his chest.
She clung to him, his shirt quickly soaking with tears.
He held her tightly, his throat uncomfortably thick. His mother. This was his mother.
“I don’t hate you,” he said, looking at the wall behind her. “I just think you deserve better than being the dirty little secret of a man who doesn’t know what he wants.”
As soon as he said it, he felt a chill run down his spine.
He stood still, his mind reeling, as his mother cried in his arms.
Chapter 21
He managed to sneak into the house without being seen by the servants. He knocked on Julian’s door, once, and waited, his heart pounding and his senses on high alert. He felt disconcertingly similar to how he felt before his rut: his skin hot, his senses sharpened, and the beast uncomfortably close to the surface.
He had rehearsed what he was going to say.
It was a mistake. It can’t happen again. I don’t want to be my father. I don’t want to hurt you. We need to put some distance between us. You deserve better than this. Better than me.
But all his rehearsed, logical arguments left his mind the moment Julian opened the door.
Julian wasn’t wearing anything seductive. All he was wearing was an old, oversized dark red shirt—and nothing else, as far as Devlin could tell.
Swallowing, Devlin dragged his gaze from those cute little toes to Julian’s well-shaped legs and thighs. Like most Dainiri omegas, Julian was on the curvier side, and Devlin’s hands itched to lift the hem of that oversized shirt and find out whether his ass was as round and plush as it had felt in his hands—
Enough. Control yourself, damn it.
It was easier said than done. Devlin grimaced, realizing that he was pumping out alpha pheromones—posturing like an animal.
“What are you doing here?” Julian said, taking a step back. His face was flushed, his nostrils flaring. “Never mind. I know why you’re here and I agree: it was a mistake. We shouldn’t have done it. We should be friends and forget about the whole thing.”
Devlin watched himself enter the room and shut the door.
He watched himself step forward. It felt like he had no control over his body whatsoever.
His mother’s words echoed in his mind. You have no idea what it’s like to fight the pull toward your mate. It’s like fighting gravity.
Julian wasn’t his mate. But he smelled of him. He still stank of him, Devlin; he smelled like his—he looked like his, he felt like his. Devlin could do nothing to stop himself from reaching out and touching him with greedy hands.
“Tell me to stop,” he ground out, laying his hands on Julian’s hips, despising his lack of control but unable to stop. Perhaps he was his father’s son, after all. “I need you to tell me to stop.”
Julian’s lips trembled. Visibly so.
“We shouldn’t,” he stammered, looking at him in a way that was both hungry and scared.
It wasn’t a no.
The fucked-up part was, that look appealed to his baser side, to the predator that lived under his skin. The predator wanted the omega to run. It wanted to catch the omega and mount him right there, regardless of any possible witnesses.
Goddammit.
Trying to quash his Xeus instincts, Devlin managed, “I’m sorry.”
Those pretty brown eyes blinked at him in confusion.
Fuck, he was so endearing. So pure. Devlin felt like a right pervert for wanting to stick his cock into him and dirty him up with his come.
“What for?”
“For this.” Devlin pushed Julian against the door, pinning him with his body. The immense satisfaction he derived from their obvious size difference made him feel vaguely ashamed, but not ashamed enough to stop himself from pushing his erection between the omega’s legs. Julian let out a moan, his body immediately going pliant, his neck tilting to the side to give Devlin access to his scent gland.