Total pages in book: 133
Estimated words: 125866 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 629(@200wpm)___ 503(@250wpm)___ 420(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 125866 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 629(@200wpm)___ 503(@250wpm)___ 420(@300wpm)
I didn’t let myself ruminate on that, though. I focused on the here and now, on the life we had stretching out before us.
And tonight, we were finally telling Sebastian about his new role in our family.
My body ached like I’d been in a plane crash as I made my way through the back of the stadium, headphones on and my head down. We’d won the game, so I made sure to keep my face pleasant, smiling a bit for the cameras as I walked by, and all their flashes blinded me. I just didn’t want to be stopped.
Because for the first time all season, Madelyn and Sebastian had come to the game.
I knew Madelyn wanted to come sooner. I knew Sebastian was dying to finally attend. But with Madelyn being sick, I refused to let her put herself through a night of misery for me. It wasn’t until we made it out of the first trimester and her nausea faded, that I agreed it was time.
We’d pitched it to Sebastian as a big night out for him. He and I spent the day together before the game, making a big breakfast and swimming in the heated pool. When I’d made my way to the stadium, Madelyn had taken over. They spent time at the park and got McDonald’s before she took him to the team store to pick out whatever gear he wanted.
And at home, there was a gift waiting for him — one he’d never forget.
My stomach was in knots as I made my way to the friends and family lounge where wives, kids, and parents gathered after the games to wait on players. I’d been so excited to deliver this news, and yet, I wanted to do it right. I wanted to make sure Sebastian understood how much he meant to us, how much we would need him as a big brother. I wanted him to feel loved and feel special.
The last thing I wanted was for this to come like a blow to the knees, to sweep him into a new reality he wasn’t prepared for.
I’d talked through it all with Madelyn a million times, and though she’d assured me it would all be okay, I was still nervous as hell.
That kid meant more to me than I could put into words.
He felt like my own.
I hoped he understood that I’d always see him that way, that this wouldn’t change anything between us.
My thoughts were shaken loose when I pushed through the door to the lounge. I was greeted by the raucous noise of families reuniting, kids running around, wives chatting, friends cheering. I lifted my chin at a few of the players as I passed them, saying brief and friendly hellos to their families as they introduced me. But my focus was on finding Madelyn and Sebastian.
When I did, my heart stuttered in my chest.
They were in the far back corner with Giana — who was absentmindedly snacking on Cheetos in a bowl that she’d apparently decided was all for her and no one else. Sebastian was wearing a kid version of my jersey along with a Seattle Seahawks hat, and he had a navy-blue foam finger that looked half as big as he was. He looked a bit tired, but mostly excited, his eyes wide and his smile stretching across his face as he told some sort of story to Giana.
And then there was Madelyn.
Her red hair was longer now than when she’d first spiraled back into my life earlier in the summer, the silky strands of it hanging down past her shoulder blades. Her cheeks were flushed, her skin glowing in a way it never had. She wore a loose-fitting green blouse and a navy-blue blazer with cut-up denim jeans that reminded me of when she was my hot babysitter.
It didn’t matter that she wasn’t quite showing yet, that she looked as if nothing was different at all about her.
I knew, under that blouse, there was a tiny little bump steadily growing more and more each day.
I knew her breasts had swollen at least a cup size, that she had a new sensitivity that sometimes made her writhe in ecstasy when I played with her, and other times made her swat me away and give me a death glare if I so much as thought about touching her tits again.
I knew every mood swing she’d had, every tear she’d let fall, and every frustrated growl she’d let loose.
I knew she was carrying our child.
And that knowledge nearly knocked me to my knees every time I thought about it, no matter how many weeks it’d been.
My chest squeezed as Madelyn laughed at something Sebastian was saying, and then as if she felt me watching her, her warm brown eyes searched the room until she found me staring back at her.