Total pages in book: 69
Estimated words: 63716 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 319(@200wpm)___ 255(@250wpm)___ 212(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 63716 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 319(@200wpm)___ 255(@250wpm)___ 212(@300wpm)
“Still.” I shook my head, unable to believe that all the hurt could be undone so easily.
Darla reached out and gently cupped my chin, forcing me to meet her eyes again. “You think I didn’t hate Fletcher for what he did?”
“I assumed you still hate him,” I said honestly. I figured that first it was the pregnancy that kept Darla with Fletcher, and then the money. I didn’t judge her for it for a minute.
I could tell by her expression that Darla knew exactly what I’d thought, and she understood. “I stayed for reasons other than love to begin with,” she said. “But then I forgave him. Because it’s very, very hard to stay angry with someone you love. Even if you know you shouldn’t love them.”
I leaned back into the couch, letting my body relax more than I ever had inside of this house. Darla’s hand had slipped back down to loosely hold mine. The fire was simmering low in the hearth, and I was surrounded by warmth on all sides. Again, an unusual sensation in this house. I thought of the party going on down below. We’d only been gone five minutes, but we’d have to go back soon. My disappearance might go unnoticed, but not the hostess’s. I couldn’t bring myself to suggest it, though. My mind was filled to overflowing with her words. “You think Julian will forgive me because he loves me?” I asked quietly.
“I do.”
I turned the idea over in my head. It was too big to be conceivable just yet, so I thought about it another way. “And I suppose if he doesn’t forgive me, that means he doesn’t love me. Not anymore, anyway.”
Another small, graceful shrug. “Think about it this way. What do you have to lose if he won’t forgive you?”
My pride, my–I grasped around in my mind for what else would be stripped from me if I went to Julian and he turned me away. The idea made my stomach turn and nausea rise, but I was surprised to realize that was all. It would be horrible, and I might never get over it, but it couldn’t destroy me.
Not the way that never seeing him again–never trying–would destroy me.
Peace joined the feeling of warmth pressing in all around me. He wasn’t married. He was who I thought he was. If I had a chance of getting him back, and all I had to risk was my pride, I would do it. Energy thrummed through my body, driving out the lethargy I’d felt earlier. I wanted to go right now. But first…
“Why are you telling me this?” I asked Darla, turning to meet her eyes. I wasn’t questioning the veracity of her words. I wasn’t even really questioning her motives. Something in the warmth and peace told me that they were pure. But I wanted to know where they had come from. What had stirred her to risk her husband’s wrath by salting the land where he’d sowed his poisonous seeds?
I thought she’d give me one last graceful shrug, a whisper of a kiss against my cheek, and say she had to get back to the party. And I think she wanted to, because for a minute, that slim shoulder lifted ever so slightly. Then she gave a small shake of her head as if to clear it and said, “I suppose I’m trying to right more than one wrong, Willow. What Fletcher did to your mother twenty-six years ago was wrong, and I let it happen.”
“You didn’t do anything though. You’ve been–” I stopped myself short of saying she’d been the kindest to me of any of them. I didn’t want to offend her by implying her children were jerks. “--so nice to me,” I finished.
“Nice to you, but hardly kind. I knew your mother struggled sometimes. I could have stepped in.”
“If you knew, Fletcher knew, and it was his responsibility.”
“Responsibility,” Darla echoed. “Yes, it was. I hope Julian Lewis takes his responsibilities more seriously.”
It was the first hint she’d given me that she knew I was pregnant. I looked at her sharply. I’d only told my mother and a couple close friends–none of whom would have told anyone else. And she couldn’t tell by looking at me, I couldn’t even tell by looking at me.
“Fletcher has everyone he cares about followed now and then,” Darla explained, and I could tell that the strangeness of this had long worn off for her. “And everyone he doesn’t trust.”
I wasn’t sure which category I fell into for Fletcher. “And they saw me going into my obstetrician’s office?” I surmised. I wasn’t sure how I felt about Fletcher and Darla knowing before Julian, but I suppose I only had myself to blame. I could have told him the day I found out, but I’d let pride stand in my way. Pride and Fletcher’s lies.