Total pages in book: 85
Estimated words: 82250 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 411(@200wpm)___ 329(@250wpm)___ 274(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 82250 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 411(@200wpm)___ 329(@250wpm)___ 274(@300wpm)
I had to be stupid to believe he was being honest with me every time he said he was heading to the gym, or to the office, or to meet with a client…when really, he was sneaking over to a unit directly across from me. A unit where he and Evan could have fucked while watching me work on my computer in the bedroom.
When Derek and I finish breaking our sweats, we hit the showers. As I’m about to get out, I realize I didn’t grab my towel from the locker room.
Shit.
Most of the guys I know aren’t shy about their bodies. Peter and Derek have never given any shits about being naked at the gym, but it’s something I’m still self-conscious about. I can put on the act like I don’t care, but I’d rather not walk around, displaying my junk like I did with Travis this morning.
Plenty of guys walk around showing their dicks at the gym.
I walk out and act casual as I pass a few guys on the way into the locker room.
My face has to be bright red right now because my cheeks are on fire, but I keep playing it cool.
When I reach my locker, I open it and retrieve my towel.
I notice someone within my periphery looking at me.
I instinctually turn and see Evan a few lockers down. Fully clothed, his duffle bag at his side, he nods to me politely.
I play it cool as I wrap my towel around my waist. While he throws his duffle bag in the locker, I pretend to keep busy with my bag until he leaves.
My cheeks tremble. My eyes water.
I’m glad I was able to keep my shit together while he was here.
I’ve run into him a few times since it’s happened. At the grocery store. At the gym. At the bar. It has to happen because we live so close to each other and run in the same circles, but considering how little time has passed, it’s still a lot for me to handle.
I wish I could crawl into this locker and cry. But I have to keep it together. There’s nowhere to run.
“Hey, Gary,” I hear someone say behind me.
I turn and see a guy I run into occasionally at the bars. I smile and wave. He’s always nice whenever we chat, but for some reason, right now, I can’t for the life of me remember his name. And it’s killing me having to smile and act like everything’s fine when I want to curl up on the floor and burst into tears.
“Hey, man. Good seeing you,” I say.
Just keep it together. Keep your shit together, Gary.
After Derek finishes showering up, we walk back to Metropolis together. When I get back to my unit, I hurry into my room and close the door, my chin quivering and my eyebrows twitching violently before I totally lose it and burst into a fit of tears. I fold my arms as I collapse onto the bed.
I can’t. I can’t do this.
It’s a thought I’ve had a lot since I discovered the truth. It’s so hard to face the world when it seems like everyone, especially Evan and Peter, is laughing at me.
But Derek’s right. I have to get back out there. I can’t hide from the world, tempting as that may be.
4
Travis
I’m nervous as hell. I don’t usually let shit get to me, but right now, it is. Every time I sit down, my leg starts bouncing like I’m a dog and getting a really good scratch. When I stand up, I can’t stop pacing the fucking room. It’s incredibly frustrating.
This is my life, though. Sure, I’m not going to lose my business if Steven decides not to front me for my retail space, but it’ll be a giant kick to the balls I’m really not interested in feeling. I like a little pain now and then, but that’s going overboard.
It doesn’t help that the meeting was set for today of all days. You’d think after all these years I wouldn’t give a shit, and in a lot of ways I don’t, but it’s still a crappy situation to be in.
I push off my dark-gray couch for the tenth time in about that many minutes before making my way to the large living room window, my treadmill next to it. South Tower is across the way—a courtyard below, separating it from North. I let my eyes travel up two floors, and I wonder what Gary is doing over there. For some reason, he’s popped into my head a few times since yesterday—probably because I feel like I owe him a sober apology. I’d be lying if I didn’t admit I enjoy waking up in beds that aren’t my own after a fun night, but it’s also pretty fucking vital that the man I’m in bed with knows and wants me there.