Total pages in book: 85
Estimated words: 82250 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 411(@200wpm)___ 329(@250wpm)___ 274(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 82250 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 411(@200wpm)___ 329(@250wpm)___ 274(@300wpm)
It’s like he’s frozen in place—his eyes wide.
“I know, right? I can’t believe I just said that either.”
He cracks a smile then, and it lures me in, pulls me to him, a force I can’t control.
“I don’t want to get hurt,” he tells me.
“I don’t want you hurt either.” Then because I need to be real with him, “And…I don’t want to get hurt either.”
He sucks in a shocked breath, and Jesus, I want my tongue in his mouth. Want to bite his lip and twist my hand in his hair and hold him close. Kiss him until he can’t breathe anything in but me.
“Can you go with me?” I ask him.
“Go with you where?”
“To Martin’s party for Liz. I don’t want to miss it. I want to be there for my brother, but I don’t know if I can do it alone.”
Holy shit, this being vulnerable stuff is hard. I sort of want to melt into the ground admitting that.
“Of course, I’ll go with you. I’m going to show you that you can trust me, Travis.” He doesn’t voice what I see on his face…that he needs me to show him that he can trust me too.
31
Gary
The party crowd is gathered on the balcony behind the Hartley Inn, a large “Happy Birthday, Liz” banner hanging across the back entrance. Everyone’s dressed like they just got out of church. Travis looks adorable in his fuchsia button-up and powder-blue bow tie. His impressive biceps fill out his rolled-up sleeves nicely. Since we started hitting the gym together, I’ve noticed he fits his clothes even better than when we first met. But as good as the top looks on him, I can’t keep from glancing at his ass, tight in the black dress pants he wears. His clothes are always so right for him. He knows he looks good and he flaunts it. In my gray button-up and black tie, I look like I’m getting ready for a funeral. I’m dressed so plainly because I’ve always worked to blend in with everyone. That’s always been my goal…until I met Travis. Since we started hanging out—since he started forcing me to see I’m more than I give myself credit for—I’m starting to feel more and more uneasy with the old me. Even these clothes feel wrong. Like with our sex, I want to explore. I want to experiment. I want to do something wild and different. Not just keep pretending to be this guy I’m not.
Travis and I stand in a line at the bar.
“You okay?” I ask Travis as he glances around uneasily. I figure he’s either scoping the place out for his brothers or nervous about running into his parents. Maybe both.
“I’m fine,” he says.
Being here with him, for something I know is so important, gives me some hope—hope I’ve had since he said he didn’t want to lose me the other day. That he thinks about me all the time. That I make him want to try. Could this really be happening? Could he actually like me as much as I like him? I’m in shock, a little bit. After our fight, I sure as fuck didn’t expect him to come running to my office to tell me he was feeling something for me. Ever since that happened, I’ve been excited but scared as shit. Maybe he’s just not a relationship guy. Maybe even though he wants to make this work, he doesn’t have it in him. He can’t force himself to be someone he’s not, and I wouldn’t want him to because I like him for who he is, not for someone I want him to become. What if this whole fake relationship thing confused things for him as much as it did for me?
That’s not my biggest concern right now. If anything, my relief about Travis’s confession has transformed into tension on Travis’s behalf over this party.
“Hey, Travis,” comes a man’s voice from nearby.
I turn and see two guys walking along a brick path that wraps around the house.
As they approach, Travis says, “Hey, guys, this is Gary. He’s my…well, he’s my Gary.”
I figured he was going to introduce me as his friend, but I like that he didn’t. Maybe I even like it a little too much.
“Hi, Gary, I’m Martin and this is Malcolm. I’m sure you’ve only heard amazing things about us.”
Even though I recognize their names, it’s nice to put faces with them. Up close, it’s easy to see their differences from Travis. They have blond hair and brown eyes—not the dark hair and beautiful hazel eyes like Travis.
“Mom called and said they’re going to be a little late,” Malcolm says, giving Travis a heads-up. Both of his brothers keep glancing my way, like they can’t believe Travis brought me here.
Welcome to the club.
“But everything’s going to be good,” Martin assures him with a broad smile, but I can see the tension in his expression. Like he’s really not confident about that. “Remember what I said: if they have a problem, they can leave. It was nice meeting you, Gary. But I gotta go get these bobby pins to Liz or she won’t be coming out of the bathroom for her own birthday party.”