Total pages in book: 177
Estimated words: 176345 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 882(@200wpm)___ 705(@250wpm)___ 588(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 176345 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 882(@200wpm)___ 705(@250wpm)___ 588(@300wpm)
But fuck me, does it explain so goddamn much … About her and her brother.
“Sicklittlebitch13… that’s why you put that thirteen there,” Milo says.
“All those predators, you kill them because of her,” Nathan mutters. “They’re an outlet.”
I grab her chin. “You did not cause your father’s misery, Lana.” When her eyes drift, I say, “Look at me. You are not responsible for what other people do. Not your brother, not your father, not your mother.”
“But I am my mother’s child,” she whispers.
And there it is.
The fucking bullet that’s been boring its way deeper into her skin until it almost fractured her heart and mine along with it.
Fuck.
I wrap my arms around her and pull her into my embrace, almost crying along with her just because of the pain she’s feeling, and I wish more than anything I could swallow all of her anguish and make it mine just so she wouldn’t have to feel it anymore.
All this time, she has been killing men who turned into monsters just to repent.
A girl with all that agony left to fight her own demons that follow her wherever she goes.
She sniffs. “When I look in the mirror, I see her.”
I lean back and grasp her face with both hands, my forehead against hers as I gaze into her soul. “You are not your mother. You will never be like her. Do you hear me? She was the foulest creature on this planet, and you are a living, walking angel.”
She tries to shake her head, but I won’t let her.
“Yes, you are,” I reiterate. “You kill to save people from pain. There is nothing more angelic than that.”
“But I’m a murderer,” she says, her bloodied hands trembling. “And I can’t stop. I can’t stop the killing. I can’t stop wanting more blood, more pain, more suffering. I can’t make it stop.”
“Then don’t stop,” Nathan says, drawing her attention away. “Don’t ever fucking stop.”
“What …?” she mutters.
He looks at her like he’s in awe of her self-control. “Kill whoever you need to kill, but don’t you ever hate yourself. You don’t deserve it.”
She blinks a couple of times and brushes the tears away.
“I understand now why you were so adamant on protecting your secrets,” Milo says. “And why you’re so obsessed with protecting people. Your brother. Us. His sister. You’re trying to erase their pain.”
She smiles gently. “I don’t understand; I thought you’d all—”
“What? Laugh? Be mad?” Nathan says, caressing her cheek. “I used to want to hate you so damn much, but now that I know the truth, how could I?”
“But you hate my brother,” she says.
He nods several times. “Yeah, well, we all know what he did to me was unfair.” He holds up his missing finger. “But I get why he’s a vicious bastard now.”
She snorts and laughs it off, but when he cups her face, she still leans into it.
“So you’re not going to tell anyone?” she asks.
He shakes his head. “Why would I?”
“Because I took your deal and—”
“Fuck the deal,” he says, smashing his lips onto hers. He holds her face like he’s afraid she might disappear if he doesn’t, and this is his last shot. And I’d be lying if I said it didn’t make me jealous just a little bit, but I know the connection we share is just as important.
Milo pushes his way through both of us and suddenly grabs her towel, shoving his lips onto hers, kissing her no-holds-barred. And when their lips unlatch, I steal her away from him to claim her mouth as mine, rolling my tongue around hers in a greedy attempt to get so much more from this divine little kitty of mine.
She is nothing short of pure perfection. A rough-cut diamond.
And because of us, she almost turned to dust.
My lips briefly unlatch so I can tell her what I’ve been meaning to say, “There is no deal; there never was.”
She looks up at me with confusion.
“I just needed a reason to have you,” I say.
“But those pictures and my username,” she mutters as I peck another kiss onto the side of her lips.
“I have way too much fun watching you kill, and if we’d revealed them, you would’ve stopped,” Milo adds.
“I just used those pictures to get what I needed, and I needed money to save my sister from those Bonesmen. But then I had you …” Nathan grabs her hand and presses a kiss on top. “And you proved to be far more valuable than money.”
“I don’t want you to just be with us because we’ll reveal your secrets,” I say, curling my fingers through hers as I bring them to my neck. “I want you to be with us because you want to.”
“I …” she murmurs.
“Could you?” Milo asks. “Be with us?”
She looks conflicted, and rightfully so. After everything we put her through, this is a lot to put on her plate. But my God, I can’t let this woman walk. I just fucking can’t.