Total pages in book: 145
Estimated words: 131455 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 657(@200wpm)___ 526(@250wpm)___ 438(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 131455 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 657(@200wpm)___ 526(@250wpm)___ 438(@300wpm)
I can't move at first, even after the door closes, and we're left alone again. I can't bring myself to look at him, either. I stare at the ceiling with its white tiles, frozen in confusion and pain. Not physical pain, although it might as well be. It feels like a fist is tightening around my heart, squeezing the life out of it.
The fact that Callum hasn't said anything, hasn't denied any wrongdoing only confirms fears. I struggle to suck air into my lungs; each breath comes heavier than the next. I was bubbling with excitement moments ago; now, all I feel is razor-hot pain. His gaze penetrates my skin right into the deep depths of my soul. He's watching me, yet I refuse to look at him. I can't.
“I want you to tell me something,” My voice is a low whisper. “I want the truth. I don't want an explanation. I don't want a lie mixed with the truth. I want the fucking truth!” I release a breath and continue, “Did you tamper with my birth control so I would get pregnant?”
Silence. It drags on for what seems like an eternity. The longer he makes me wait, the worse it is. I don't even need to hear him admit it, for his silence is the biggest answer. However, I want him to say it. Tears fill my eyes and spill over my lashes while every second stretches like taffy, on and on.
“Let me explain.”
“I did not ask you for an explanation,” I whisper harshly. “I asked for the truth. Yes or no.”
His defeated sigh says everything. “Yes.”
“Get out of the room. I want to be alone.”
“Bianca—”
“I do not want to be around you right now!! Respect me enough to give me a few moments alone since you couldn't respect me enough to allow me to make a choice regarding my own body.” I don't care if it hurts him. In fact, I wouldn't be upset if it did. Not after what he's done.
He hesitates, lingering like he's waiting for me to change my mind. That's not going to happen. It takes a slow count to ten, with me staring at the ceiling because I refuse to look at him right now, before he crosses the small room in a few steps and opens the door. He stays for a second longer, like he's considering what to say, but when I turn my face toward the wall, he walks out.
Immediately I cover my face with my hands and start to cry. He tricked me. Now, that word doesn't begin to cover it. He lied. He manipulated me. All so he could get what he wanted. It's not like he didn't tell me his plans to get me pregnant right away, but I didn't believe he would go to these lengths. I couldn't have made this up in my head if I tried.
How could he? He's supposed to love me. You don't trick the person you love. You don't tamper with their birth control to get what you want. That's not love.
But he got what he wanted. I'm pregnant with his child. What am I supposed to do now?
That's the worst question of all, the one that leaves me choking on my tears. I'm sure he's out there, listening, and I don't want him to hear. The idea of keeping a bit of my pride seems important. He's already taken my choices from me, so I won't let him take my pride away, too.
What do I do?
Lowering my hands, I sit up, then pull myself together. I have to think of the baby, first and foremost. What's best for it? After that, what's best for me? How do I live with this man, knowing what he's willing to do to get what he wants? It didn't matter to him that I had a life and goals of my own.
Were they really goals?
I shake my head at myself as I pull on my leggings. No, it's true, I was only living the life I thought I had to live. Getting the degree, the job, all of it. Still, if I wanted to change things. That should have been my decision. I should have had a choice. I shake my head with frustration. He's waiting for me out there, and soon enough, I will have to get in a car and go home with him. What happens, then? What's my move?
What's best for the baby? Because, in the end, that's what I have to focus on now.
On one hand, he's not the man he used to be. That much, I believe. The Callum I first fell in love with wasn't the man capable of going behind my back, messing with my pills somehow, or even giving me a shot. When did it happen? I guess it doesn't matter now.