Total pages in book: 161
Estimated words: 149338 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 747(@200wpm)___ 597(@250wpm)___ 498(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 149338 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 747(@200wpm)___ 597(@250wpm)___ 498(@300wpm)
She was mine.
For the rest of my life, I would never let her go.
And I didn’t.
In the last year and a half, Sophia really became part of our family. She even helped my mom plan my eighteenth birthday party a few months ago. They went everywhere together for weeks, making sure they had the perfect cake, food, and entertainment. I think my mom saw her more than I did. The party was a fucking shit-show. My mom wanted it to be extra special because I was officially an adult now. A man was what she called me, no longer her baby.
She and Sophia had gotten close in the last year. They loved each other. And since Sophia had lost her mother at a young age, my mom took her under her wing. Sophia was interested in things Amari didn’t give a fuck about, and my mom took advantage of that any chance she could get. She taught Sophia how to cook all my favorite meals, what kind of Spanish spices she needed to have at all times, and other random shit, like how to fold my clothes.
It was how she took care of my father, and if she was trying to mold Sophia to be anything like her, then who the fuck was I to complain?
I let her have that.
I think she tried to pretend like I hadn’t seen the things I had. As if my father wasn’t showing me more and more violence as the days went on. How the world really wasn’t a good fucking place. Seeing bloodshed had become the norm for me. My mom, Sophia, and Amari all looked the other way when I came home with bloody, cut up knuckles or blood-stained shirts.
My father had his dirty hands in everything from drugs to guns to clubs. He was the definition of organized crime, and there was very little that he didn’t own and operate. Politicians, police, FBI agents, they were all corrupt and all in his pocket. Not a damn thing could be traced back to him. He’d built a motherfucking empire on nothing but shady-ass shit.
The darkness that was all around our family only dragged me further and further into the abyss.
Mom didn’t acknowledge the present he handed me on my birthday, wanting nothing to do with it. Two matching 9mm Glocks with a harness that I was to wear under my suit jacket at all times. Never being allowed to leave the house without being strapped. Sophia wasn’t too happy about it either, but didn’t say a word to me. She knew what kind of life I was leading. The look on her face spoke volumes the first time she put her arms around me and felt the guns between us.
The irony was not lost on me.
A few weeks before our graduation, I took Sophia back to that same room where I took her virginity. Following through with my promise, I never gave her a ring so I had to redeem myself. I wanted her to know I was serious. Last time she never gave me an answer, her agreement was left unspoken, but I needed to hear the word, “Yes.” She excitedly agreed as I put a white gold infinity ring on her finger. Making her another promise that I would replace it with a diamond after we told my father we were engaged. I didn’t want to have to answer to him so soon. I just wanted to enjoy our engagement for as long as I could.
There was no hiding it from my mother. She noticed her finger with the sparkling band as soon as we walked in. All she did was smile to herself as she strolled away from us. I knew we had her blessing. It wasn’t her I was worried about.
When I put the ring on Sophia’s finger I also promised her that she didn’t have to do a damn thing once she was my wife. I would take care of us.
She said all she wanted was a family.
I let her know that I would gladly make that happen the night of our wedding, if that’s what she wanted. Prom was in a few weeks and graduation wasn’t far behind that. I couldn’t wait to get the fuck out of school. I wasn’t going to college, that much was a given. I don’t even know why I bothered finishing high school, other than because it made my mom happy. She wanted my diploma to hang right next to Amari’s on the wall or some shit. Amari graduated last year along with Michael. I thought about what she said a few years ago in the attic, all the time. About getting the hell out of here as soon as she graduated and was old enough.
She was still living at home nearly a year later. I was hopeful that maybe she accepted this was her life and at the end of the day…