Total pages in book: 161
Estimated words: 149338 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 747(@200wpm)___ 597(@250wpm)___ 498(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 149338 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 747(@200wpm)___ 597(@250wpm)___ 498(@300wpm)
“I gave Michael, your father, four years to come clean. Four fucking years he was given to tell Amari the truth. She deserved to know how much of a piece of shit he truly was. He never loved her. I knew that since day one. Amari was blind, but love does that to you. She got pregnant with Briggs to fucking trap him, that is how desperate she was to keep him around. That is how much she loved the motherfucker. I loved my sister more than anything in this world, Lexi. There’s not a day that has gone by that I haven’t thought of her. Every day I find a way to beat myself up for taking her life. I see her, I feel her every goddamn second, judging me with so much disappointment in her eyes. Amari was my light, much like you are. I never had any intentions of hurting her. And if I could switch places with her, I wouldn’t think twice about it. Amari got caught in the crossfire. Esteban—”
“Esteban? Briggs’ bodyguard?”
“Yes, he fucked up, and it cost my sister her life. Michael was supposed to be alone. But Amari’s car broke down on the side of the road, and Michael had to go rescue her and Briggs…” I closed my eyes, leaning my head into my hands. The memory of that day played out in front of me. Making me relive it again as if no time had passed. Hearing her voice on the message she left me the day she died, every goddamn day since. If I would have just answered her call, I would have been able to stop it all. She would still be alive. I wouldn’t have ruined Briggs’ life.
“It was pouring out. Esteban didn’t see Amari and Briggs were in the car with Michael. He did what I ordered him to do. So, instead of breaking his fucking neck, I assigned him to Briggs. Making him see the broken little girl every day. Payback for taking away her family. His fuck up. It was also my way of pushing her away. I couldn’t handle seeing her break down, scared, and alone. I never let Briggs get close to me. I never held her while she cried. I never told her I loved her, too consumed by the shame and guilt from taking her mom away. It has been one of the biggest regrets of my entire life. I love Briggs more than anything. It’s too fucking late for me to show her, the damage has been done. I’ve tried to make it up to her though by being the uncle I always wanted to be, with her children, Amari and Michael.”
I had never shared that with anyone. No one knew the truth. I pulled my hair back away from my face. Peering up at her with glossy eyes. Not caring if she saw my raw pain, my devastation unfolding out in front of her. It was time she knew the real truth buried beneath the lies.
“I needed to get out of my penthouse. Hearing Briggs fall apart every night, knowing I was the cause of her misery, was eating me fucking alive. I would have put a bullet in my head if it weren’t for her. I can’t tell you how many times I stared at the loaded gun in front of me. Fighting a battle with myself not to pick it up, aim it at my head, and end it all. But I couldn’t, I stayed alive for Briggs. I couldn’t be selfish. My sister had made me promise to raise her if anything ever happened to her. Briggs needed me. I was the only family she had left. My punishment was to keep fucking breathing. I ended up in Rhode Island, watching you get off your school bus. You were already such a cute fucking kid. I knew Sophia was in bad shape, I knew it was only a matter of time until…” I shook the thought out of my head. “You had your arms at your sides, practicing your ballet steps. Humming a melody all the way home. Walking by yourself in a shitty fucking neighborhood like you were a grown-up. No one to watch out for you, but fuck… Lexi, that didn’t stop you from fucking smiling. And it lit up your entire face.”
Her eyes watered as she took in every last word that came out of my mouth.
“I couldn’t help but be drawn to you. I followed you home, and you didn’t even realize it, which made me hate your fucking mother a little more. Anyone could have followed you home. You walked into your house, screaming for your momma. I went to the side of the house and watched from the window. You found her bawling in the closet, sobbing for the lives of Michael and Amari that I took.”