Total pages in book: 161
Estimated words: 149338 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 747(@200wpm)___ 597(@250wpm)___ 498(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 149338 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 747(@200wpm)___ 597(@250wpm)___ 498(@300wpm)
With her heart breaking for me.
I watched the limo leave, taking what I desperately wanted to be mine with it. Standing there with my hands in the pockets of my slacks, for I don’t know how long. Watching the rain pour down from the sky, flooding upon me for my behavior. Silhouettes of my mother and sister appeared through the storm clouds, with no remorse. As fast as they appeared, they were gone. I spent the entire evening there, waiting for a sign that I was doing the right thing, an epiphany to get us out of this fucked up situation. Nothing happened. I let the rain wash away my sorrow, Lexi's face haunting my thoughts.
Burning inside.
A feeling I was accustomed to.
Except this time, I felt like I couldn’t take it anymore. My demons pulling me under, dragging me further and further into the ground. Burning me alive, when I’d already been dead all this time. That was the problem with the whole situation, Lexi revived me.
She was trying to save me when all I would do was destroy her.
Darkness fell over the cemetery by the time I said goodbye to my mother and sister. Apologizing for not coming to see them sooner, I couldn’t remember the last time I was here. It pained me to think about it. It was late by the time the limo came back and got me, and it was even later by the time I got back to my penthouse. Walking in a daze, fighting an internal battle to rectify the situation. Resisting the urge to go into Lexi’s room, knowing she’d be wide awake.
Waiting for me.
I took a shower, leaning my forehead against the ceramic tile. Letting the scolding hot water run down my back, welcoming the burn. My body physically aching for some rest, some sleep, something, anything that would make my mind stop running wild like a hamster spinning on a fucking wheel. I stayed in there till the water ran cold, getting out, throwing on some boxer briefs, and instantly fell back on my bed. Instinctively, taking my gun with me. Placing it under my pillow with my strong grasp around it. I was just going to close my eyes for few seconds, let the rain soothe my splitting headache.
Instead, I passed the fuck out.
I couldn’t remember the last time I slept so solid, so sound. I was used to every little noise waking me up. Never being able to relax enough to allow my REM cycle to lull me away. There was no rest for the wicked, the demons that haunted me never slept. No matter how exhausted I was, they were right there waiting.
I didn’t have to open my eyes to viciously attack my prey. I had been waiting for someone to kill me all my life. It was only a matter of time until they found me in a moment of weakness. Without thinking, I acted on pure impulse, savagely gripping the shadow’s throat beside me, coming in contact with the motherfucker in my bed. Before I even fully opened my eyes, I immediately flipped them over, straddling their body, locking them in place by their throat.
My first initial thought wasn’t my safety.
It was hers.
No one ever came into my bedroom, not even Lexi. I silently prayed for the first time since cursing God that they came into my room first, having no idea she was in the penthouse with me. My grasp tightened harder at the mere thought that something could have happened to her. Needing to kill the motherfucker in my grasp with my bare hands as they struggled against me. Putting up a fight as I suffocated the life out of the bastard. It wasn’t until I hovered above them, pointing my gun directly to their fucking forehead, that I opened my dark, dilated eyes.
Ready to fucking kill.
Realizing very fucking quickly it was Lexi beneath my hold, fighting for her life. Her tiny frame struggling with everything she had in her, fear and panic like I’d never seen before.
Of me.
My eyes widened, crudely jerking back in horror from the scene unfolding under me. Still straddling the woman choking under my grasp, I instantly eased up on my ruthless hold around her throat. Sliding my hand down to her collarbone, pinning her to the bed. Easing up on my weight, still looming above her. She immediately gasped for air, clutching onto her neck, coughing every few seconds. Her eyes watering, her body shaking, desperately trying to breathe in the air I so violently ripped away from her.
The terror on her face was enough to bring me to my knees and beg for forgiveness. Exactly the way she had just begged for her life, moments ago. She withered beneath me, slightly arching her back, fixing her eyes on the barrel of my gun. Her mouth opened wide, panting profusely. Her wide, brazen eyes shined with fear, tears threatening to spill over. A heated glare I was more than familiar with, stared back at me at the same time. Her thoughts running wild as she tried to recover, bunching the silk sheets in her trembling hands. Her coughing subsided when the air finally ran through her lungs, panting profusely. She wanted to say something, opening her mouth and closing it several times not knowing what to say