Total pages in book: 49
Estimated words: 48187 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 241(@200wpm)___ 193(@250wpm)___ 161(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 48187 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 241(@200wpm)___ 193(@250wpm)___ 161(@300wpm)
I want her to tell me what’s wrong, but she doesn’t. She kisses my neck, her tears soaking me, as she works her hips. Up and down. Up and down. This is what she wants—needs—and I’ll give it to her. Even if it kills me to have her like this.
Pressing my lips to her hair, I whisper the words that are probably inappropriate and too soon, but words she needs to hear nonetheless. “I love you, angel.”
“I love you too,” she breathes against my neck. Hot and unapologetic.
Gripping her hair, I pull her mouth to mine. I kiss her deeply as though I have the power to climb inside her and touch her flickering soul. As though I have the ability to heal it with just a kiss. I’ll damn sure try.
She works me good with her expert movements until I’m groaning out my release. Her body doesn’t slow until she’s sure I’m done. Then, she collapses against me, exhausted and spent.
“Best four minutes of my life,” she jokes. I hear truth in them too.
“At least seven minutes, angel. Get your facts straight.”
“Little liar who lies,” she mutters, pulling away to look at me, the grin quickly falling from her pretty lips. “I start dialysis next week.”
With my softening dick inside her and our heartfelt proclamations of love still lingering in the air, my girlfriend tells me we’ve just moved to the next level. And it has nothing to do with our relationship.
“I love you,” I whisper.
It’s the only words I can say.
I’ll say them as many times as I possibly can, because time feels limited and finite.
Fuck time.
Lauren
Six months later…
“Go fish,” I tell Taylor, a little blond-haired boy with big green eyes.
He taps a button on his iPad and squeals. I glance down at my iPad, groaning to see he’s just “got his wish.”
“Boooo,” I gripe. “You always win.”
“’Cause I’m the best fisher, Lo-Lo,” he says, grinning.
He’s in the next station over. We can look at each other, but aren’t close enough to touch. If we were, I’d give him a big hug. I love that kid. For being eleven and requiring dialysis already, he’s such a trooper. We’re always scheduled at the same times on the same days. He’s my little buddy.
“Fine, you’re the best,” I concede. “Want to play another round or is your famous YouTuber more exciting than me?”
“He just put out a new Fortnite video,” he explains, pulling his headphones up to his ears. “I can’t miss it.”
I playfully stick out my tongue. I’m in dire need of studying anyway. College is hard, especially with so many hours a week spent at this hell hole, but I love it anyway. I quickly lose myself in my English assignment, wondering how this stuff will even help me when I become a therapist one day.
Mom would be so proud. I know Dad is. And Daniel is just excited that I’ve made a plan, rather than wallowing in despair. It gives me something to focus on, so I don’t focus on the crappy parts of my life.
Even when I’m having my worst day, I realize it could always be worse. Like Taylor, for instance. He’s parentless. Was living with his aunt when his mom died, but then his aunt decided to drown out her stress with a bottle of pills. Went to sleep and never woke up. He’s lost the people he loved to death and now lives in a foster home.
When I go home each night, my dad is there. No more overnight or weekend trips. He was true to his word, staying in town for work. And even though Landon moved out with Callie, they’re home all the time visiting and eating up Dad’s food because they’re poor. I have a dad and brother who care about me. Taylor has no one.
This is one of the reasons I want to be a therapist. I want to know how people handle the shit in their lives and be able to help them handle it better. People like Taylor need to talk out their feelings. Behind his big green eyes is heartbreak that he hides with silly smiles. He’s like me, and maybe that’s why I recognize it so easily.
“It’s so quiet in here,” a deep voice booms, warming me to my core. “Did you bore Taylor to the point he’s ignoring you now?”
Taylor snorts and waves to Daniel.
“No, brat,” I grumble. “A new YouTuber video.”
“So that’s what we’re calling it,” he says to Taylor, winking in exaggeration. As though he really just needed an escape from me.
“Don’t you have bedpans to clean out?” I bite back.
Daniel, amused at my grumpiness, saunters into the room. He pulls out a sucker and hands it to Taylor before walking over to me. I’m given a root beer one since those are my favorites.