Total pages in book: 171
Estimated words: 164459 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 822(@200wpm)___ 658(@250wpm)___ 548(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 164459 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 822(@200wpm)___ 658(@250wpm)___ 548(@300wpm)
He picked up his pace, our bodies so close we felt like one. We made the sweetest, most terrifying love I’d ever endured. It was intense and heavier than ever before. My body was his, but my mind was focused on one thing:
Getting him to stay.
He released before I knew it, breathing heavily with his face buried into the crook of my neck. My skin hummed with pleasure, my blood coursing with bliss.
We were quiet for a few seconds.
He finally picked his head up and looked down at me.
I smiled.
He did the same, but very faintly.
It was in that tiny moment that I felt safe with him again.
Whole.
Protected.
I should have known feeling that way wouldn’t last with someone as dubious as him.
I fell asleep with him still beside me, but it was when I awoke that I realized he wasn’t there.
He was gone, and my clothes still remained scattered on the floor.
My emotions got the best of me. First it was sorrow, and then it was full-blown rage.
I jumped off the bed and grabbed my robe out of the closet, sliding into it quickly. I picked up my phone next, but as I turned and dialed his number, that’s when I noticed something hanging on my vanity.
I cupped my mouth instantly and dropped my cellphone, trooping ahead and staring at the necklace.
It was the cross I’d given him in fifth grade. Mitchell’s cross.
Not only that, but there was a note on the mirror written with my erase board marker.
THIS, I SWEAR TO YOU, IS NOT GOODBYE
It was thoughtful, but it was also indecent of him, and I didn’t care. I immediately snatched up the cross and threw it full-force at the mirror with a loud grunt.
Glass shattered everywhere, sharp splinters trickling onto the carpet. I watched each piece land—the broken reflections I knew would haunt me for the rest of my life.
For a cheap, old thing, that cross caused a lot of damage, but nothing happened to it at all. Not a single scratch or crack.
I didn’t even care for the damage done to the mirror. The brokenness couldn’t amount to what I felt inside.
My heart had been shattered much worse than that.
I wanted the heartache to go away.
I wanted Mitchell back.
He could always make me smile during my worst.
I wanted to be happy again.
I wanted to smile.
I wanted—I wanted Drake.
I ached for his touch, longed for his body to be next to mine again.
But days went by and nothing happened. I stayed in my room. I never wanted to leave, in hopes that he might return.
But he never did.
I was devastated.
The days went by.
Before I knew it, it was time for me to pack my things up.
Yale was calling. Life was calling for me, but I wasn’t ready to face her yet.
But life, just like time, waits for no one. You either live, or you waste away, turning into a rotten, broken mess that can’t be repaired.
I refused to waste away.
If he wanted to start fresh, then so could I.
And I was going to do so in Connecticut.
Far away from home.
Far away from the memories.
Far away from Mom.
Far away from the love Drake and I once shared.
I was getting the hell away from it all, and I promised to never, not once, look back on what Fox River had done to me and the people I loved most.
Chapter 23
Jenny
Minutes ticked by sluggishly.
The passing hours became painful.
I had two more days in Fox River before going off to Yale. Kylie got a scholarship from University of Washington a while back. She was taking up theater and the arts. She wanted to be a voice actress and model. Funny thing was I could totally see her being both.
I sat at the dining table with a bowl of cereal in front of me. My leg was bouncing, and every time Sue asked questions about school or me I gave rushed responses.
She knew when something was wrong with me.
“Is it about your boyfriend?” Sue asked when she noticed me staring down at my half-eaten meal.
I looked up rapidly, locking eyes with her. Hers were soft and I could tell they held a lot of wisdom. She smiled sweetly as she grabbed my bowl. “Done with this?”
“Yes,” I murmured. She stepped back, waiting for an answer. “To both.”
“Ah. I see.” Her lips pressed. I pulled my line of sight away again, focusing on the wooden tabletop. “You miss him a lot?”
“No. I hate him.”
“Now, now. Don’t say that, Jenski. You aren’t capable of hatred.” Jenski was what she called me for fun.
“Well, now I am. I hate him. He left.”
“You don’t mean that.”
“Yes, I do.” I continued avoiding her eyes.
“Well, if that is true, why don’t you look at me and say it?”
Through the corner of my eye I saw her fold her arms.
I swallowed thickly, sitting back in my chair. “No.”