Total pages in book: 132
Estimated words: 128801 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 644(@200wpm)___ 515(@250wpm)___ 429(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 128801 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 644(@200wpm)___ 515(@250wpm)___ 429(@300wpm)
Because the air deepened, a shiver blowing through. An arrow of warmth and a quiver of need.
And a second later, Ryder was coming for me.
TWENTY-EIGHT
RYDER
Restraint wasn’t exactly my strong suit, and I had none of it then. Every ounce of it obliterated when I turned around to Dakota standing in the doorway.
Wearing black sleep shorts made of thin sweats material and a matching pajama top that kept falling off one shoulder.
Still soaked from her son’s bath.
In her expression was something I’d never dared allow myself to recognize before.
Like she was imagining what it might be like if this was our truth. If we did this every night, and I didn’t have a lifetime of garbage strewn between us.
They were obstacles that I should heed.
What should have me diverging.
Changing course.
But I didn’t think there was a goddamn thing in this world that could keep me from her right then.
“Dakota.” Her name left me like a plea, and my hand was going to the side of her face and pushing up into her hair as I backed her out of the doorway and into the dim-lit hall.
A short gasp left her, and she blinked at me. Cinnamon eyes swirled with so many things.
Confusion and need and questions I didn’t know if I had the strength to answer.
“I keep trying to stay away from you. Don’t think I know how to do it any longer. Don’t think I can.”
I spun her into the hallway wall, pinning her back to it. My nose went to the slope of her neck, breathing her in.
Sugar and vanilla. The sweetest thing.
“Cookie,” I murmured into the night.
“Who said I wanted you to stay away from me?” The challenge was back, her chin lifted.
Guilt constricted, and I let my fingertips wander the angle of her jaw. “I keep trying to do the right thing, Dakota. Keep trying to be the good guy, but I don’t want to be him right now.”
A glutton stealing more. Taking what I shouldn’t have all while knowing she should have belonged to me.
Cody’s warning kept rolling through my mind. Hitting me on a circuit. Because I knew he was right.
But I was stuck on this girl who had me on a hook.
“And who do you want to be?”
“I want to be the guy who’s pleasing you. The one who’s making you come. Over and over again. I want to make you beg my name.”
A flood of desire coated the atmosphere. Dakota released a wispy breath, and her fingers curled in my shirt, needing something to hang on to.
“Want to be the one who’s showing you how gorgeous you are,” I murmured as I wound my hand into her hair. “How beautiful you are. The way you steal my breath every time you walk into the room.”
She exhaled, shaky and long as I pulled her head to the side to expose her neck. I pressed my mouth there, to the silky, smooth skin, and I rolled my lips along the delicate slope. “Do you have any idea, Dakota? What you do to me?”
There was a tiny shake of her head. “No. Not with you.” Hesitation brimmed before she shifted to meet my eyes, this fierce girl whispering her truth into the lapping night. “You were the one person I wanted to be something different for.”
It fucking gutted me.
Seared me through with the hot blade of a knife.
“How could you ever think that?”
A trembling sound rolled up her throat. “How could I not, Ryder? How could I not think that you didn’t want me? That you didn’t desire me? That you wanted something different? Because I spent a whole lot of years questioning, what was it about me that you didn’t want. What weren’t you attracted to. My personality? Because I was pretty sure you liked that. Or was it my body?”
Pain leached into her voice, and she looked away when she asked, “Do you think I didn’t notice the type of women you went after?”
I reached out, taking her by the chin, prying those eyes back to mine. “I went after them because I couldn’t have the one woman that I wanted. Because I knew I would never be worthy of you, Dakota. Because I knew I’d never be good enough. And I’m still not, and here I stand, a fucking bastard for even thinking about touching you.”
I shouldn’t be.
Not yet.
Not until I fixed this.
And still I was sliding my arm around her waist, tugging her against me and walking her backward into the closest room which happened to be hers. The lamp glowed from her nightstand, and I edged her back until we were in front of the full-length mirror that was leaned against the wall.
Slowly, I shifted her around, and my hand slid around and came to rest on her stomach as I turned her to face the mirror. I looked at her reflection from over her shoulder.