Total pages in book: 132
Estimated words: 128801 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 644(@200wpm)___ 515(@250wpm)___ 429(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 128801 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 644(@200wpm)___ 515(@250wpm)___ 429(@300wpm)
She didn’t know how long they remained there in the silence, his breaths choppy and strained, his knees hugged to his chest. He had his chin propped on them as he stared out into the nothingness, but she doubted much he could see very far through the fog of pain.
She didn’t want to say something stupid like she was sorry, so she finally whispered, “I brought you something,” as she popped off the lid.
The scent of chocolate and sugar and spice wafted up to her nose, and Ryder made a grumbled sound. “Of course, you brought me something.”
He shifted his face to her. It was red and splotchy, and his eyes were nearly swollen shut from the tears.
She’d known his momma was dying for a long time. She’d been sick for years. But to her, it’d seemed like it’d been that way forever, and she guessed there was a part of her that had imagined that it would just continue to stay that way.
But she’d learned two days ago that death had a way of catching up.
She passed him the tin, and he reached in for a cookie and took a bite. He tipped his head up to that starlit sky and chewed slowly, sniffling as he swallowed. He continued that way until he’d eaten the whole thing.
Then he turned back to her.
His big red smile was crooked.
All wrong.
“How’s it that just tasting something you baked could make me feel better?”
She thought it was kind of a tease, and she rolled her eyes and faced forward. “I know it doesn’t make it any better at all, but I just wanted you to know that I was thinking of you.”
That he wasn’t forgotten.
He’d always made her feel like she was important, and she wanted to do the same for him.
His smile tweaked a little deeper before he grabbed another cookie and took a bite, whispering around it, “No, Dakota. You’re right. It doesn’t feel better. I don’t know if it ever will. But I’m still glad you were thinking of me.”
Her chest felt achy, and her stomach felt hollow. She couldn’t imagine what it would feel like if it was her mom. Her dad had died when she was two, and she couldn’t remember him at all. She only recognized him from the pictures her mom had shown her through the years and the ones that were plastered all over the house.
She wondered if there was anyone who would be there now to help Ryder remember.
“What’s going to happen now?” she whispered. “Where are you going to live?”
The last two days had been hurried. Her mom and Ryder’s aunt had put together the funeral and the reception, which they’d had here at Dakota’s house. Dakota had spent all that time baking and preparing, too, knowing it was the one thing she could do.
More tears fell down Ryder’s cheeks. “I’m going to live with Ezra, I guess.”
Behind it came an angry sound.
“That’s not where you want to be?”
His head shook as he stared out into the night. “No. I want to be home. With my mom. But she’s not there any longer, is she?”
He choked that with an ugly fury, and he yanked at the locks of his black hair, making a sound so low and deep that she knew it came from a place that was rarely seen.
A place people only knew in times like these.
A place filled with agony. A torment that felt like it would suck you under.
She knew he was hurting so bad, but there wasn’t anything she could do to stop it. Not the same way as he’d always been able to do for her.
“I told my aunt I wanted to stay at my house. That I’m sixteen, and I can take care of myself.”
“She won’t let you?”
His laugh was dark. “Maybe she would have, but she told me she has to sell the house. There are all these medical bills that need to be paid. So, that fucking cancer didn’t just steal my mom, it stole my home, too.” He spat it through clenched teeth.
Then he was on his feet in a flash.
Jumping off the branch without saying anything.
A storm where he raged below her.
“You should go to bed, Dakota. It’s too late for you to be out here.”
Her heart panged. She hated that he was treating her like a little kid.
She was compared to him, but it was the first time he’d ever made her feel that way.
“I have to get out of here.” He croaked it, disoriented as he looked around as if he were searching for something that had gone missing.
“Where are you going to go?” Fear clotted her whispered words.
His head shook harshly. “I don’t know. Anywhere. Just…away.”
He turned and started to walk, disappearing into the thick bushes and trees.
And she wanted to call out to him.