Total pages in book: 88
Estimated words: 84002 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 420(@200wpm)___ 336(@250wpm)___ 280(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 84002 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 420(@200wpm)___ 336(@250wpm)___ 280(@300wpm)
Which was ridiculous and made Shane’s heart go fucking crazy at the same time. “I like hearing you say my name.” He sighed, pushed his hands into the pockets of his jeans, and said, “I don’t know if I can do it.”
“Just don’t say no. All I’m asking is you don’t say no.”
“Okay,” Shane replied. Because he wasn’t ready to say no yet, either. He wanted possibility. Needed it just as much as he needed his next breath.
Van stepped closer. He fingered Shane’s hair. “Jesus, you’re beautiful.”
“No, you are.” Shane grinned playfully.
“We both are.”
“Kiss me,” Shane told him and Van did. He tasted like tequila, beer, and happiness. He smelled like paint and musk. Shane pulled his hands out of his pockets and grabbed onto Van’s waist.
They kissed like it was the last time they ever would.
Like they had to get their fill.
Like they were the only two people in the whole fucking world.
When they pulled away, Van pressed his forehead to Shane’s. “I’ve had a lot of men, Shane. I’ve done a lot of things. I’ve made my dreams come true, but none of it feels quite like being with you. I know it sounds like bullshit—movie shit—but it’s true. It hasn’t been very long and hell, maybe we’re just too drunk on each other right now and we’ll realize in a week, it’s not what we want. But I think we should give it a try. I still wanna talk to you every day and make plans for you to come see me. I want to try.”
Shane sighed, wrapping his arms around Van tightly. “God help me, but I want to try too.”
CHAPTER TWENTY-EIGHT
It was only a couple days later that Van left.
He’d spent all of them with Shane. At Shane’s.
He’d said his goodbyes to Annie first, and now he stood outside his parked car, packed with his shit, and looked at this man who’d turned his world upside down.
“I feel like we’re in Dirty Dancing,” Van said with a grin.
“What?”
“When Baby and Johnny get caught and Johnny has to leave. When they’re standing by his car saying goodbye. That makes me Johnny. I wouldn’t mind being Baby though.”
Shane shook his head, softly chuckling. “You’re crazy and I can be Baby.”
“Shh.” Van touched Shane’s lips. “I hear the song in the background.”
And then they laughed again and Shane kissed his forehead. “Drive safe, yeah? I checked everything in your car and filled the fluids.”
“Yes, sir.”
“You should fly next time.”
“I will. Needed the drive to sort my thoughts this time.”
“Get out of here.” Shane nodded toward the car. “Keep in touch.”
Van got into the vehicle but didn’t close the door. Christ, this was harder than he thought. “I left the painting for you. It’s in your closet. I didn’t want you to know I was leaving it. Get your ass in your studio more often. I expect an update on all the shit you’re making.”
“Yes, sir,” Shane echoed.
“Talk soon,” he replied, closed the door and drove away.
It took everything Van had in him not to turn around and go back.
CHAPTER TWENTY-NINE
One month later
“Hey, you,” Van said and watched Shane grin back at him. He could feel the damn thing through the computer screen.
“Hey right back at you. How was your day?”
“Pretty good. I had those two photoshoots I told you about.”
“Is that normal?” Shane asked. “Two in one day?”
“No. I actually don’t shoot as much as I paint but it just happened to fall that way this time.” Van shook his head as he adjusted the laptop that sat on his thighs while he leaned against his headboard. They’d talked on the phone practically every day since he left. Usually at night when their days had calmed down. He told Shane what he was working on and Shane would tell him about new cars he got in. They’d chat about his mom, or Libby, or going out for beers with Ryan.
He learned more about Shane too—like he hated strawberries and was allergic to bees. His favorite color was gray, and when he was a kid he wanted to be an astronaut because he wanted to explore somewhere so much bigger than Last Chance. Somewhere that was infinite.
Van told Shane he loved poetry, his biggest fear was drowning, and he didn’t understand how anyone in the world couldn’t like strawberries.
They’d talk through the night sometimes. He felt like a giddy kid, crushing on someone for the first time. Only Van had had a hundred crushes and he never did this so there was a good chance this was more than a crush, which he’d honestly known since before he left.
There was something right about them together and even though he loved the phone calls and their weekly Skype sessions, he missed being in the same room as Shane.
“Good. I might get jealous of you being around all those pretty boys who are naked,” Shane said pulling him out of his thoughts.