Total pages in book: 126
Estimated words: 122206 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 611(@200wpm)___ 489(@250wpm)___ 407(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 122206 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 611(@200wpm)___ 489(@250wpm)___ 407(@300wpm)
“Merciful Christ.” Angel JJ shook his head. “Lilly is a tyrant. She said those feckin’ pictures for that shoot would be used for a one-time calendar only!”
“She lied.”
“Obviously.”
“She’s not a liar. She’s a tattoo artist,” I corrected. “She inked me tonight.”
“Excuse me?”
I turned my head back to Dante and beamed as I lifted my hand and pulled off the stuff wrapped around it. I showed off my new tattoo, proud as can be. “Lilly branded me.”
“Oh, my God!” Dante barked with laughter as he grabbed my hand and stared at the little letters. “Ina, honey, what’d ye do?”
I blinked. “I didn’t kill him. That wasn’t me.”
“What?” Dante’s jaw dropped. “Who got killed?”
“Somebody got killed?” I gasped. “Who?”
Angel JJ’s laughter filled the car as Dante rubbed his head.
“I can’t get a straight sentence out of her.”
Was he talking about me? I was worried instantly. I even knew what was wrong.
“If we don’t follow the memo”—I swallowed—“the Martians will steal our light bulbs. We can’t let that happen, Dante. How would we see?”
He burst into laughter as he hoisted me against his chest. “I love you, woman.”
“I’m very sorry, Angel Dante.” I shook my head. “I’m in love with me boyfriend, who is the real Dante. I can’t accept your love.”
He grinned at me. “I can’t sway a kiss out of ye?”
“I’ll kick your big toe if ye even try!” I glared. “I am a woman in love. Have some respect, ye wagon.”
“Apologies, my lady.”
I accepted his apology with a nod.
“Me power is low,” I said with a sigh. “I need more of the brew to feel the tingles. The fanny ones.”
I smiled when Angel Dante laughed again. I loved listening to his laughter.
“Look, specs, we’re home.”
Home?
I turned my head and saw my apartment building.
“Me teleportation spell worked,” I said, pleased. “I’m magical, y’know?”
“I’ve heard that you’re a lesbian non-binary witch with a cookin’ show.”
“Don’t be so stupid,” I scowled. “There’s no such thing as a lesbian non-binary witch with a cookin’ show. The bank would never give one of us a loan.”
Dante’s shoulders shook. “Come on, country.”
We got out of the vehicle, and I was shocked when I looked at the driver of the car and realised who he was.
“Angel Harley!” I whooped. “I love ye so much.”
I flung myself at the man, hugging him tightly enough that he wheezed a little.
“Sorry.” I stepped back. “I forgot how strong I am. I could’ve crushed ye.”
He smiled down at me. “You go on to bed, honey, ye hear?”
I saluted him. “Yes, sir, commander sir!”
I turned and sprinted towards the road until I suddenly wasn’t running anymore. My feet weren’t on the ground, and I was in the air. I was flying. “I’m superwoman!” I shouted. “I knew it! Fuck you, Clark Kent!”
“Don’t just stand there and laugh!” Dante’s voice bit out. “Help me!”
There was a lot of shouting, swearing, and declarations of needing sex before I made it inside my apartment, but from who, I didn’t know. My teleportation spell worked twice now. I was so powerful.
“Home sweet home.” I kicked off my heels only to realise they were no longer on my feet. “I’ve been robbed! Me shoes are gone. Call NASA!”
“Got them right here, Ina girl,” Harley hollered. “And on that note, I’m outta here.”
“Bastard!” Dante shouted. “May ye get the runs while stuck in traffic!”
“Oh my God.” I sat in front of the bear in my sitting room that was splitting lines of cocaine with his credit card on my coffee table. “I am a huge fan of your work, brother bear. I can’t believe ye came to see me … I have someone I need ye to eat.”
Soft chuckles surrounded me.
“I’m worried,” Dante said. “Should I bring her to the hospital? I’m terrified she has alcohol poisonin’.”
“She looks fine. She’s just flat-out drunk. Lilly’s devil brew is somethin’ only gods can drink.”
“Gods and Ina, apparently.”
I looked up at the men, shook my head, and looked back at the bear.
“Not them. They’re good folk. They don’t need to die.”
“Wow. I’m leavin’. Good luck.”
“Arsehole.”
The room went silent as the bear disappeared to go and eat the enemies of Knit Happens, like I instructed him to do.
“I’m part of a secret society,” I announced. “You’re not allowed to tell no one. Ye’ll have to be killed if ye do.”
“These lips are sealed.” I was helped to my feet. “Let’s get to bed, hmm?”
I was suddenly tired and hot, so I unzipped my skirt and wiggled it free until it fell around my ankles.
“Christ.”
I looked around. “I don’t see Him.”
Angel Dante laughed from behind me but said nothing further. He helped me strip until I was wearing just my knickers. “Finally.” I sighed and shimmied my boobies. “I’m free from the titty holder.”
Lips pressed against my neck. “You’re beautiful.”
I turned my head and smiled. “Me new spell worked.”