Total pages in book: 38
Estimated words: 34295 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 171(@200wpm)___ 137(@250wpm)___ 114(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 34295 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 171(@200wpm)___ 137(@250wpm)___ 114(@300wpm)
My bestie is no longer my bestie.
"I hate you," I hiss to him.
"Love you too, boo," he says, blowing me a kiss.
We step out of the foyer into the hallway of the club. I think about slamming my eyes closed to pretend we aren't really inside a BDSM club, but quickly decide that'd be childish and resist the urge. I'm supposed to be a sophisticated adult out for a night of naughty fun.
I've never felt less like an adult than I do right now…and I've never felt much like an adult. I'm twenty-four, but most days, I still feel like I'm bumbling through this whole adulthood thing, trying to figure it out.
Aside from my career, the rest of my life is a disaster. I've never been very good at taking care of myself. I should be a pro by now, considering I've been doing it for most of my life. And yet…I still haven't mastered it.
The sad truth is I don't think I want to master it. The Sterling Rope may not be the place for me, but I ache for something I've never admitted to anyone except for Corey.
I don't want to be tied down and put on display, walked on a leash, or shared or punished with pain. None of that sounds like a good time to me.
I just want one man to love me unconditionally. For once, I don't want to have to worry every moment of the day. For once, I want to know what it's like not to have to worry at all. I want to let it all go and…feel.
I want a daddy.
I shiver, pulling my arm from Corey's to wrap mine around myself. Even thinking about what I want feels salacious and forbidden, which is ridiculous. I'll never find the daddy of my dreams if I can't even think about him without blushing.
"Come on." Corey smirks, practically quivering with anticipation as he cuts right, heading toward the bar. "Let's get this party started."
Of course he's excited. As soon as he found out about this place, he applied for membership. It has to be difficult being a gay submissive in a town like Silver Spoon Falls. Everyone tries to set him up with every gay man they know, but they're always these nice, innocent boys who don't know the first thing about handling a submissive like Corey.
Coming here in a town like Silver Spoon Falls, where everyone knows your business, is completely terrifying to me. What if someone finds out I was here? What if they find out my secret? I haven't been in town for very long. I don't want to be ostracized simply because I want the things I want.
I've tried for a long time to pretend I don't crave what I do, but I've never been able to wish it away. I'm not convinced I'll find it here, and coming is a big risk to take. But I'm here now, and I won't leave Corey alone to fend for himself.
So, I take a deep breath and reluctantly follow him to the bar, praying I don't live to regret this.
"This place is insane!" Corey calls over his shoulder, grinning at me as soon as we enter the bar.
"It's definitely something," I whisper back, staring in shock at the elegant bar. It's not at all what I expected. Then again, I'm not sure what I expected. Naked people? Whips and chains? I don't know!
This is tasteful elegance steeped in luxury. The bar itself runs along one entire wall. Recessed lighting sets the mood, with elegant tables and high-back booths scattered around the rest of the space. Men in thousand-dollar suits and women dripping jewels lounge around, sipping expensive cocktails.
Some are obviously together. One woman is snuggled up on an older man's lap while he pets her hair. Another is tucked carefully against a younger man's side. Others are less familiar with one another but are engaged in lively conversation.
"Fisting is acceptable," a petite blonde says cheerfully. "Anal and vaginal. Choking is a hard limit."
"How do you feel about choking on cock?" her companion asks.
I quickly rip my gaze away from their table, my face on fire. Clearly, this is an important conversation. And it's not my business. But my stomach quivers with anxiety anyway.
Anal fisting?
Maybe I should have reminded Corey that I'm a virgin before I let him drag me here. I think he may have forgotten that important, glaring detail.
"Um, Corey? I really don't think I should be here," I whisper-hiss, trying not to panic. Maybe if I tell myself I'm a sophisticated adult often enough, I'll start to believe it. Or maybe I'm full of crap, and I should just go before I decide that I should die a virgin.
Anal fisting? I didn't even know that was a thing you could do.