Total pages in book: 130
Estimated words: 124971 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 625(@200wpm)___ 500(@250wpm)___ 417(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 124971 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 625(@200wpm)___ 500(@250wpm)___ 417(@300wpm)
BJ shook his head, probably trying to rid himself of the mental image of his reserved, English-rose ex-girlfriend getting defiled several times by a faceless man.
“You say you want to see accountability? Well, there you have it. I’m happy you slept with the guy. I deserve it too. But I’m a changed man, Duffy. And I still want you. I want us to start over. To do it again, the right way this time. Please, would you give me a chance?”
Old Duffy wanted to say yes. New Duffy, however, had both a spine and healthy self-worth.
“I can’t divorce him now,” I said coldly. “We’re in the process of getting me a visa.”
It was easier than telling him the truth—that I felt nothing at all toward him anymore, and even if I had still loved him, his actions were unredeemable. My mum had a saying—jam could never become fruit again. That was how I felt about BJ and me. We were jam. We could never return to our initial form.
Plus, there was something else that was bothering me about my relationship with BJ. Something completely independent from the way he’d wronged me. And I could only point that out now.
I had always felt like I’d faded away in my story with Brendan Abbott Jr. If we were a picture, I’d be the landscape. That thing in the background that exists solely for the purpose of emphasizing the subject of the story. I was tired of being his plus-one.
BJ pressed his lips together, looking down. “I’ll wait.”
“It’ll take years.”
He nodded, not looking at me. “I’ll give you decades if need be.”
There was a beat of silence while I tried to think of ways to turn him down politely. It annoyed me that after everything that had happened, all the heartache and wrongdoing, all I was left with was dull disappointment and a bit of sadness for BJ, who was daft and arrogant enough to think he could get away with having his cake and eating it too.
“BJ . . . ,” I started on a sigh.
“No. Don’t say a word. Not before I do this.” BJ held up a hand. He turned around and hurried to his bag, retrieving something square, black, and velvety from it. He returned to me. When he was about a foot away, he lowered himself to one knee and stared up at me like I was a sky full of stars. Like I held the answers to all his prayers.
“Daphne Markham. I will wait until my last breath if need be. Begging for a chance to prove myself every day. We could move in together, or we could stay apart. I’ll be a good husband to you. Loyal and faithful. I’ll give you everything you ever wanted. Money, class, prospects, opportunity. You won’t have to work a day in your life ever again. All I ask is one thing—say yes. Marry me.”
He flicked the box open. The diamond inside was square and big, surrounded by small shiny diamonds. It looked gorgeous and sinfully expensive. Upper-six-figures expensive. The kind of engagement ring you flaunted once, then shoved in a safe, since it was unsafe to carry around.
It was perfect, but not for me.
I loved Riggs’s ring. The unusual, quirky, classy heirloom. It was rich in things that weren’t money. With history and memories and nostalgia I wished I knew more about. It was something I could pass one day to my own child.
A crazy thought invaded my mind. Did Riggs know me better than BJ did? Even during the week he gave me that ring? When we were still complete strangers?
Oh, God. He did, didn’t he? He knew me then and had got to know me even better every day since.
And me, I loved him. I love him.
So much it hurt to breathe when he wasn’t around. That the thought of him boarding a plane and going somewhere for months made me want to wither into something tiny that he could put in his pocket just so I wouldn’t have to say goodbye.
That tangled web I’d woven around me, made of rusty barbed wire to fend off genuine feelings to a man, had somehow been cut, ripped, and destroyed by a man who had zero aspirations to fight for my heart.
I was in love with my husband.
I had to tell him. Not tomorrow. Not in a few hours. Now.
Tears prickled my eyes, and I cupped my mouth in astonishment.
I was so shaken with the revelation that I didn’t even notice the door dragging open and Riggs walking inside. He looked ashen. But when he stopped in front of us and saw the scene of BJ on one knee, and me standing there with tears in my eyes, his face turned from ashen to destroyed.
And that was the moment when I knew what love truly was—the need to know you’re someone’s entire world, and still not want to ever witness what your power over them could cause.