Total pages in book: 106
Estimated words: 98226 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 491(@200wpm)___ 393(@250wpm)___ 327(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 98226 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 491(@200wpm)___ 393(@250wpm)___ 327(@300wpm)
“I’m good. Busy. Tired.” She yawned, and it was then that I realized it was the middle of the night there. “I was actually sleeping, though. I think you forgot about the time difference.”
“Oh God, I’m sorry sis.”
“It’s okay. I’ve got a busy day tomorrow.” She paused. “Er, today now, I guess. But maybe I can call you later this week and we can catch up?”
My heart sank, and a million responses screamed at me in my head.
No, I need to talk to you now.
I need someone to tell me what to do.
I need someone to help me figure out the mess inside my head.
“Sure,” I said instead, sighing with the resignation.
Juniper was silent for a moment. “Everything okay?”
God, no.
“Mm-hmm.” I sighed, shaking my head as I forced a smile even though she couldn’t see it. “Just needed to hear your voice.”
“Aww, you big softie. I’ll give you a call later this week. Okay?”
I swallowed. “Okay.”
“Until then, give Joel my love, and for Pete’s sake, sis, have some fun. You sound like you’re wound up tighter than a virgin’s asshole over there.”
“Juniper!”
“Oh, get over it. I’m nineteen.”
I chuckled a little at that. “I love you.”
“Love you, too. I’m going back to sleep. You go have some fun,” she said again, and then the line cut out, and I was alone with my thoughts again.
What a dangerous place to be.
Joel walked through the cabin door at 8:04 that evening.
I was still in bed, reading a book, which I laid flat on the comforter at the sight of him. His eyes were red and puffy, along with his nose, as if he’d been crying too. His dark hair was sticking up this way and that, his shoulders slumped as he dug into his pockets and emptied everything out of them, dumping his wallet and keys and such on the dresser.
He looked as tired and worn and sad as I felt.
“Hi,” I said tentatively.
I expected him to jump into bed and throw himself on me. I expected an apology, an explanation, a promise to never do it again. I expected a flurry of kisses, his arms encompassing me, his forehead pressed to mine. That was always how it went. We were like any couple — we had our fights, but we always came around, and making up was the best part.
A night with just the two of us, connected in the most intimate way we could be — that was exactly what I needed to get my mind off my stupid Theo fantasies.
Joel’s eyes were flat when they met mine. “Hi.”
I swallowed. “How was your day?”
“Fine,” he said on a sigh. “I’m going to take a shower.”
“Can we talk first?”
“Dammit, Aspen, I’m tired, okay? It’s been raining, I don’t feel good, and I had a long day on the boat. I just want to take a shower and go to bed.”
He seemed exhausted just from having said the words, the deep rumble of his voice etched with weariness.
Remorse was nowhere to be found.
I frowned, closing my book and setting it aside before I stood and rounded the bed to where he was. “Are you not even sorry about what happened last night?”
“About your overreaction to me having fun? No.”
“Joel…”
“I’m sorry,” he said, pinching the bridge of his nose on a sigh. “Look, I really don’t feel well. I’m not myself right now.”
“Hungover?”
He glared. “No, like I actually feel sick, but thanks for that.” He shook his head, stripping his shirt overhead. “I’m getting in the shower. We can talk tomorrow.”
“I’d rather talk tonight.”
“Well, I’d rather not.”
With that, he slammed the bathroom door to seal his point.
I was fuming while he was in the shower, pacing back and forth, planning out everything I would say when he got out. Except that when he actually did, I saw it — really saw it — how long and worn his face was, how the puffiness and redness wasn’t from crying, how just the sight of him made me feel achy in my bones.
He really was sick, and as much as I wanted to talk, I wanted him to be okay even more.
“Do you need anything?” I asked.
“Just sleep. I’ll be okay.”
I nodded. “Alright. Mind if I keep my lamp on to read?”
“Do whatever you want.”
He crawled into bed with a cough and a wince, then he rolled onto one side, facing away from me as he turned out the light on his side of the bed. He didn’t say goodnight, didn’t give me a kiss, and within minutes, he was snoring.
I sighed, crawling back into bed next to him and leaning against the headboard.
I’d spent nearly the entire day in the room, save for the few times I snuck out to get food, and I was beginning to wonder if it had even been a day at all. It was one of those weird stretches of time that could have been a dream. I felt antsy, like I needed to get out, but my body protested, keeping me firmly in bed.