Total pages in book: 143
Estimated words: 138287 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 691(@200wpm)___ 553(@250wpm)___ 461(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 138287 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 691(@200wpm)___ 553(@250wpm)___ 461(@300wpm)
It was then I saw that Connor was definitely not high and my organs began to work again. “You made this?” I looked down at the carrot cake, not quite able to picture Connor in the kitchen waiting for the oven to ding.
Connor began to nod, his expression still grim. “Yeah,” he spoke quietly. “It’s a therapy thing.”
Oh. Of course.
But I didn’t feel much like eating.
The silence that surrounded us was suffocating.
“What happened today?” I asked quietly. “The bad news?”
He looked hesitant. I didn’t like that. And when he scratched at his temple, his jaw tightened. “I spoke to the record company about getting Virgin Tears removed from my backlist.” The laugh he let out was completely humorless. “But it’s one of their biggest sellers and no matter how much I begged, no matter what I bargained, I don’t have a legal leg to stand on. As long as Left Turn are with them, they pretty much own our songs.” His look of shame was a punch to my gut. “Sorry, baby.”
“Oh,” was all I could say because I had no idea it was something he was even thinking about.
And when Connor spoke again, my heart broke. “So, you just think every time I have a bad day, I’m gonna shoot up, fuck you and everyone else I care about?” He sounded deceptively calm but I knew he was hurt.
The thing was, I’d had a scare myself and rather than placate him, I shrugged and said, “Past behavior is usually the predictor of future behavior.”
He blinked at me a moment. “You know what?” His eyes narrowed as he snatched back the plate on the counter. “No cake for you!”
Oh, that was it.
This was bull.
I stood, fuming, and headed back down the hall but Connor was hot on my heels. “Wait.” When I kept walking, he wrapped his arms around my middle and stalled me. “Stop! Jesus.” When he moved to stand in front of me, he looked adorably confused. “Are we seriously fucking fighting because you came here and I wasn’t high?”
God, he was simple sometimes.
“No, Connor.” I stared up at him. “We’re fighting because you didn’t text me, because I called and you didn’t answer.” My voice rose. “We’re fighting because I was afraid, and even though I had some serious work to do tonight, I’m here!” I was embarrassed when unshed tears stung my eyes. I blinked them back. “After what you did to me, those girls saved me, and I still choose you. It’s pathetic. I’m pathetic.” I laughed as the first of many tears fell. “And what’s worse is they understand that they’ll always come second to you and they’re not even mad,” I cried openly, “and they should be!” I swiped at my cheek, but the river of tears continued to fall. “So, if that wasn’t clear enough for you—” My tone was scathing. “—we’re fighting because I love you more than anything or anyone and you are an ungrateful shit sometimes.”
Suddenly, he looked miserable. “Oh no.” He clicked his tongue before snaking his arms around me. “I made you cuss.” I fell into him and cried silently. He rested his lips at my crown and squeezed me tight. “Don’t cry, baby. Please? You’re breaking my heart.”
“I was scared,” I croaked, “and you don’t even care.”
“Are you kidding me?” He pulled back to look into my eyes. “Of course, I care. I love you.” His face fell. “I’m so sorry I didn’t answer the phone. I was asleep. I didn’t hear it. I’ll never put it on silent, not ever. Won’t happen again. I swear.” He put his hands to my cheeks and pressed his lips to my forehead, speaking against my skin. “Come sit with me a while.”
I allowed him to lead me into his stunning black-and-cream decorated living room. He sat me on one luxurious cream sofa then gently removed my shoes, placing the heavy heels on the ground then rubbing my feet. And I let him.
“I’m sorry if I came across ungrateful,” he muttered, massaging the sole of one foot with his thumb. “But you need to know that what you feel for me is nothing compared to what I feel for you.” He peeked over. “I got it bad, that desperate, make you crazy kind of love. And it fucking consumes me.” Connor looked down at the small foot in his hands. “I can’t think about anything but you, all day, every day. You’re running through my mind, making me miss you all over again. When you’re not here with me, I feel it everywhere. It physically pains me to be apart from you. But I’m trying my hardest here, baby. I can’t help it.” He huffed out a humorless laugh. “I’m addicted to you.”
My soul eased hearing everything my heart craved to hear months ago.