Total pages in book: 120
Estimated words: 116254 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 581(@200wpm)___ 465(@250wpm)___ 388(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 116254 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 581(@200wpm)___ 465(@250wpm)___ 388(@300wpm)
“Am I supposed to see that as a long time?” Kai countered. “Besides, you just had sex with me yesterday.”
Breck scowled and anxiously rubbed his skull, his drunken gaze darting as he floundered for a response.
Because he had no response. No defense.
Kai was right—which, deep down, really fucking chaffed.
And now Kai’s expression was saying he didn’t want to deal with this shit.
“Breck,” he stated firmly, as if hoping Breck would listen. “Over my dead body will I be your booty call. And never will I ever be a skeleton in your closet.”
“It’s not like that, and you know it!” Breck felt panicked and didn’t know why.
“Do I? Because it’s starting to look that way to me. You think you’re so important that you deserve me for yourself. And now you’re trying to stake some kind of claim. If you can’t muster the courage to show up for me, then don’t expect me to reserve myself for only you.”
“I wasn’t—” Breck shook his head. “I mean, I don’t— I just— I have my future on the line here. A career I have to protect!”
Kai’s features tightened, as if Breck had just pushed some button. “Right. Your career,” he muttered. “Because in the end, that’s all that matters.”
“Kai. Come on. Don’t be like that. You know I wish shit was different. Please. Just the thought of you touching another guy makes my head fucking crazy.” He knew he sounded pathetic but didn’t care. It’d taken too long to bridge this distance between them. And what he’d found with Kai was way too good to let go.
Kai frowned, looking like he wanted to believe him—but didn’t. “Not my problem.”
Breck reared back, as if he’d been slapped. “Damn. Harsh much?” Something ripped in his chest.
Kai held his gaze, looking determined to hold his ground. “Just being real. I won’t give you what you want, and you can’t give me what I need. I’m not one of your groupies, Breck. I’m a man with self-worth. Go back to your frat house. I’m sure you’ve got a harem there eagerly awaiting your return.”
Breck shook his head adamantly. “But I don’t want them.” I only want you.
“Really? Not even the one who left that lipstick on your cheek?”
Fuck.
Breck scrubbed the side of his face. “It’s not how it looks.”
Again, Kai frowned like he wanted to believe him. “Yeah, well, maybe it should be how it looks,” he murmured. “Because this thing you think we’ve got doesn’t exist.”
Breck’s heart clenched miserably. “C’mon, Kai. Stop playing.” Again, he tried to reach for him, but Kai pushed his hand away.
“I’m not, Breck.” Kai’s tone was stoic. “I’m not playing.”
Breck shook his head, confused and agitated, but mainly distraught. “I don’t understand. What happened? Why are you being like this?”
Kai went quiet, then muttered so tightly it sounded like his vocal cords were being squeezed in a vise. “Because I realize I need to nip this in the bud. You’re too young for me. And in a lot of ways, too immature.”
Like a match struck, Breck’s ire ignited, all his tamped-down emotions exploding with a fiery burst. “Bullshit!” he shot back. “I’m not immature!”
“And yet you’re throwing a tantrum right fucking now.”
Breck bristled, even as his chest fissured wider, then got in Kai’s face and angrily canted his head. “Go fuck yourself, Kai Nakado. Go. Fuck. Yourself.”
* * *
Shoving into his car, Breck just sat there for a minute, tense and breathing heavily, his mind a riotous mess, one leg still out the door.
What the hell just happened in there?
He peered up at Kai’s place as rain pelted his windshield, eyes locking onto the low light emanating from the windows of Kai’s garden. The sight exuded calm, and yet down here, he felt anything but. His pride had just taken a beatdown—never had a lover ever turned him away—and yet the biggest blow Kai delivered had gone straight to his heart.
Grimacing, he rubbed his sternum, then punched his steering wheel. How could Kai do this, be such a fucking dick? Breck clenched his jaw, determined to stay angry. But as he peered back up at Kai’s place, his brows pinched miserably on a groan.
Yes, Kai had been an asshole, but Breck couldn’t exactly blame him for cutting him loose. If their roles were reversed, he’d have done the same. Nobody wanted to be another’s shameful secret, all kept in the shadows where the world wouldn’t see.
Especially not someone like Kai. He’d never be okay with being demeaned like that. He’d told Breck he picked his lovers with care. That a sexual communion meant something to him.
Breck closed his eyes, inhaling raggedly. He couldn’t breathe. It felt like a bomb had blown a hole in his chest. What kind of mess had he gotten himself into? And more importantly, what had he just fucking lost?