Total pages in book: 18
Estimated words: 16787 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 84(@200wpm)___ 67(@250wpm)___ 56(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 16787 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 84(@200wpm)___ 67(@250wpm)___ 56(@300wpm)
As I watch him struggling, my stomach sinks further into my gut. How long has he been sick? Why didn’t he tell me? Why would he hide something like this? So many questions plague my mind, but the reality is he’s visibly ill.
“What is it?”
My father takes another deep breath of the inhaler before he throws it back in the drawer, then shuts it. “Cancer.”
“You need to give me more than that,” I demand in a low voice.
He scoffs, surely amused I inherited his attitude. “Small Cell Lung Cancer.”
“All right, well, what are your treatments? Cancers can be cured.” I’m silently telling myself he could get through this, even if his body looks so bad already.
“Not this one. There’s no use, Cillian.” Father wipes the handkerchief against his mouth and balls it up in his hand. His eyes find mine again, and his expression is indifferent. I hate how emotionless he can seem sometimes.
“Why would you say something like that? There’s chemotherapy, radiation. I’ve even heard about some immunotherapy options. I don’t know a lot about it, but I’ve seen articles while scrolling social media. You could try—”
“Drop it, boy.” My father’s words come out as callous as ever.
My lips curl up in disgust. Does he not even want to give it a shot? It could save his fucking life. “No, I won’t fucking drop it! Why haven’t you explored these avenues? Why aren’t you trying to fight for your life? You have an entire family. We need you here. You’re the one who oversees us all, you’re . . .” I stop speaking, realizing it’s not the fact he’s the one we look up to the most. It’s a fact he’s my father, and I’d already lost my mother. I never even had the opportunity to speak to her before she died.
“I found out too late, Cillian. It’s spread to my liver, my bones, my brain. I won’t do it. I refuse to put myself through treatments that could only kill me. I’ve looked at the numbers, I know my chances with treatment and without, and I won’t go through with it. It rarely makes a difference with this type of cancer, Cillian. It will only ruin the short time I have left, and I ask you to please respect my decision. You need to understand treatment isn’t something I’ll do. I will tell you what I told your brother. I was fortunate enough to find out before it was too close to the end. It’s given me time to make preparations for when my time comes, and that is something to be thankful for. It might not seem like it, but it is.”
I shut my eyes and force back tears. I’m not supposed to cry. I’m a man, and my father’s raised me better than this, but how else am I supposed to cope? My father’s telling me he’s dying and that there’s no hope for him.
“Who in the family knows, and I mean really knows?”
Father takes in a deep breath, and his words come out in a wheeze, “Adrian, Santino, and Marzia. I think Ryder and Aurora have their suspicions. I’ve not said anything to them.”
Jesus. He’s keeping this from us all. Immediately I want to call Adrian and tell him exactly what I think about him keeping secrets.
“Enough about me. You need to be there for your family when I’m gone. Your entire family, boy—” Father coughs near the end, and I stay quiet as he finishes his coughing fit. “Keenan and the rest of your siblings are going through a hard time. I’ve received notices from my contacts that some of their bills are past due. Keenan does everything he can to keep them afloat, but I think it’s time you know the truth, that you all know the truth about your mother’s family.”
I narrow my brows, expecting him to say something else, but he doesn’t. “All right. What is it you’ve kept from me?”
“Your mother was the product of a bastard bloodline. She has Mackenzie blood in her.”
Mackenzie? “As in the Irish Mackenzies?”
“They would be the ones,” he quickly tells me.
I swallow as the information sinks in. “Why are you telling me this now?” There has to be some ulterior motive.
“Because I won’t be here forever, Cillian. You’ll need to find your own place in this world, a place that isn’t overshadowed by your brothers or me. You have a unique opportunity to get closer to the Irish. I know you’re not one who wants to be the face of a family, even if it is your right. So, you need to do the right thing and tell Keenan. This way, he has the opportunity to better provide for the rest of your siblings.”
“Why are you all of a sudden giving a fuck about Keenan?”