Total pages in book: 95
Estimated words: 90642 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 453(@200wpm)___ 363(@250wpm)___ 302(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 90642 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 453(@200wpm)___ 363(@250wpm)___ 302(@300wpm)
Stefania sits with me out back as sweet-smelling logs crackle in the fire pit. Laura’s discussing horror movies with Davide and they’re both smoking cigars. Simon took Emily back home—she’s practically an inch away from giving birth. Brody’s clearing up inside and pouring everyone more wine.
“I’m sorry about what happened,” Stefania says, keeping her voice low. “Davide told me about it and I’m still blown away.”
“None of us had any clue, but it makes sense, right? I mean, why else would Dad go out of his way to keep Santoro alive at every turn?” I shake my head and look up at the stars. “I just don’t understand why he pulled the trigger.”
Stefania’s quiet then moves her chair closer. “I think your dad finally understood. Sometimes you can love a person and you can hate them at the same time, but the person you loved is long gone, and the person you hate is still here. Does that make sense? And I think your dad finally realized that he was stuck in the past.”
“It was the attack. He said that’s what did it.” I pick up a stick and toss it into the fire. “I don’t think I’ll ever really totally understand.”
“That’s okay though, isn’t it?” Stefania smiles at me and puts a hand on my arm. “Look, you want to fix everything. It’s what you do. But you can’t fix what happened in the past, and you can’t fix this whole situation. Sometimes you just have to focus on what you can control.”
The sliding door opens and Brody steps out. He carries over wine for me and Stefania, and stoops down to kiss me.
And maybe she’s right. I can’t magically make everything with Dad okay. Simon’s going to be pissed for a long time, and I doubt any amount of talking and explaining will fix it. They have to come to their own conclusions and find a way to move on if they want to. I can be there to talk, to listen, maybe to nudge them a little in the right directions—but I can’t wave a magic wand and make everything okay.
Brody sits in the chair next to mine and I take his hand. It’s big and warm and I rub my thumb across a callus. He’s right there for me, always by my side, even though this whole situation’s completely fucked. That doesn’t seem to matter. For the first time in my life, I feel like someone else is taking care of me, instead of the other way around. He smiles and I smile back.
Chapter 48
Brody
Istand in front of a small crowd with the smell of the lake in the air and jab a ceremonial shovel into the dirt. Fifty feet away, the skeletons of several buildings are already beginning to crawl toward the sky as construction crews work overtime to get this project started, but this makes it official.
“Congratulations,” Elena says, kissing me hard, before I’m paraded in front of a bevy of officials and prominent local business people. I shake hands with Captain Kennedy, who gives me a big grin and a wink, and Maggie O’Malley pulls me into a hug.
“You owe me,” she hisses in my ear, giving me a shrewd look. “Omar sends his regards, by the way.”
“He fucking does not,” I say with a laugh, and Maggie shrugs.
“Yeah, he doesn’t, but fuck him. He wouldn’t fall in line, and you know what that means.” She slices her hand across her neck.
“Please don’t destroy the guy’s political career because of me. He already hates me enough.”
Maggie punches my arm. “Don’t worry, big guy, it’s not your fault, but I’m sure he’ll blame you anyway.”
I don’t get a chance to argue. A reporter from the Tribune snaps a photo for the website and starts interviewing me about the project. I give her as many details as I can, really talking up how the Waterfront’s going to get revitalized starting with a bunch of high-end condo buildings plus shopping and dining options. I’ve never talked so fucking much, and eventually I hand the schmoozing duties off to Seamus and Declan, who are much better suited to this than I am.
“You should be proud,” Mom says and gives me a hug. Molly and Caitlin are both there talking to various cops and state officials. “You got the whole family out and working.”
“It’s what we do, right?”
She laughs lightly. “Here I was thinking you were lawyers, not real estate developers.”
“We’re a whole lot of things.”
“I’m proud of you.” She squeezes my wrist. “You’re so much like your father.”
I hug her again. “No, Mom, I’m just like myself.”
Elena pulls me away and Mom beams at me. I think she understands what I mean. I want to be like my father—but I also have to learn how to be like myself.