Total pages in book: 362
Estimated words: 347293 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 1736(@200wpm)___ 1389(@250wpm)___ 1158(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 347293 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 1736(@200wpm)___ 1389(@250wpm)___ 1158(@300wpm)
“That’s what we’re counting on.” I thought of something as my gaze moved from him to Lailah. “If Sotoria chooses to be reborn, will you still go into stasis?”
“Yes,” he said without hesitation. “I have to, Sera. If I don’t, I wouldn’t be in a good headspace to even be around her. If she retains her memories, I wouldn’t be the Attes she remembers. And that’s…” He sighed heavily. “That’s the last thing she’d need. And if she chooses to be reborn, I want her life to be happy. To be good. She deserves that.”
“But you love her,” I whispered.
Attes nodded. “And that is why I will be in stasis.”
Heart twisting, I drew in a breath that stung. To give up the possibility of being with someone just to make sure there was no chance you would disappoint or cause them harm? And he would be giving up that opportunity. I doubted a mortal’s lifespan was enough time in stasis for it to be of any real help. That was true love.
My gaze shifted back to the sleeping Primal goddess. “Do you love Lailah?”
Attes was quiet for so long, I didn’t think he’d answer. When he did, he did so with a question. “Do you think it’s possible to love two people at the same time?”
I thought about it. “I think it depends on the person. Not everyone would be able to, but some could. And probably do.”
His gaze flickered to mine before returning to Lailah. “I agree with that.”
That wasn’t an answer.
But it also was.
Saying goodnight, I closed the door. As I started down the hall, I wished I could’ve said something to help Attes with his grief, but I knew there really wasn’t anything I could say that would heal those deep wounds. They were like mine. Only time would mend them, I supposed. At least, I hoped.
My heart was even heavier, those emotions mixing with the agitation as my pace quickened in my search for Ash, my slippers whispering over the stone. I could’ve just waited for him to return to our chambers. Or, at the very least, put on something other than a robe since I wore nothing but a thin nightgown underneath. But I wanted to make sure he was okay, and, well, I was feeling rather…needy.
I hoped he was alone. I wanted some time with him before we barreled forward with our plans. A few moments where I could be Sera and not a Queen. Or the Primal of Life. Or even a fighter. Where we weren’t on the verge of coming face-to-face with Kolis. I wanted time where I didn’t have to be strong.
Luckily, the foyer was empty. I let my instincts guide me past the hall leading to his office and to the guarded doors of the throne room. What was he doing in there? The guards bowed as they opened the door for me.
“Thank you,” I said, stepping into the dimly lit space.
Only a few of the candles on the walls burned, and it was too overcast for much starlight to come in through the open ceiling, but I immediately saw Ash. He stood on the dais near the thrones. A flutter erupted in my chest, easing the heaviness there as his gaze locked with mine.
“What are you doing in here?” I asked, starting toward him.
“Thinking,” he said, crossing his arms. “Has Lailah awakened yet?”
“No.” I passed the empty benches. “But I imagine she will soon.”
His gaze tracked my approach with a predatory glint that brought a flush to my skin.
“I saw Attes,” I told him. “Since he wasn’t allowed to have whiskey, he’s with her.”
Ash snorted. “If he had the whiskey, the only difference would be that he’d be drunk off his ass while in her chambers.”
I climbed the steps. “Probably.”
“It will do him some good,” he said after a moment. “Being near her, that is.”
I raised a brow, thinking that was the first time he didn’t have something caustic to say about Attes’s interest in Lailah. “Hopefully Theon feels the same.”
A half-grin pulled at his lips. “I think he will, just this once.”
“So, what were you thinking about?” I asked as he opened his arms to me. I stepped into his embrace, resting my hands on his dark-gray tunic. The moment one of his arms came around me, the racing of my heart slowed, and that anxious knot of energy loosened. The effect he had on me was nothing short of magical.
He buried his hand in the hair above my braid. “Our children.”
My brows flew up. I had thought he’d say something about his mother. “I wasn’t expecting that answer.”
Another grin appeared, but this one was almost…shy. “I wasn’t really expecting to be thinking about that myself. It didn’t start off that way. When I wandered in here, I was thinking about my mother and how she is now with my father. I still can’t believe it.”