Total pages in book: 107
Estimated words: 101163 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 506(@200wpm)___ 405(@250wpm)___ 337(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 101163 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 506(@200wpm)___ 405(@250wpm)___ 337(@300wpm)
Dr. Yoffe shakes my hand and then introduces us all to Maria Romero. He had explained that hospice would be involved from here on out. While many people can leave the hospital and enter into hospice care within their own home, he said it was not a good idea in Aiden’s case. While it’s my understanding the doctors are all unanimous in their consensus that the sepsis is too far gone for him to recover, every single person who has laid hands on this boy is holding out hope. And for that reason, they want him in the hospital so that they can take advantage of any sliver of opportunity that may present itself and be ready to provide medical intervention.
“Do you want me to wake Aiden up now?” Lilly asks.
“Yes. Let’s get him up.”
It takes a while to rouse Aiden from sleep. He didn’t refuse breakfast but he only had two bites of oatmeal before he pushed the spoon away and told Lilly he didn’t want any more. She managed to get him to take a sip of orange juice and then he fell right back asleep.
Aiden has gotten so weak over the last few days, he can’t leave the bed on his own and the nurse inserted a catheter for him to urinate. Because he’s getting IV fluids to keep him hydrated, the catheter and bag are necessary for now. But because his kidneys are struggling to work due to the sepsis, it might not be necessary for long.
I move to the very back of the room, farthest from the bed while Lilly gets Aiden up. Because his lungs are filled with fluid, he’s been sleeping in a semi-upright position to make breathing easier, but she uses the bed controls to raise him even higher. With some gentle shaking of his shoulder, she manages to wake him.
“I’m tired,” Aiden whines, pulling the covers up to his chin. His gaze is bleary as he glares at his sister.
Lilly smiles at him, rubbing his head. “I know, buddy. And you can go back to sleep in a minute, but Dr. Yoffe is here and he wants to talk to you.”
Normally, when Dr. Yoffe comes into the room, Aiden lights up like a Christmas tree because they have a close relationship. Instead, his eyes track sluggishly across the space and take the older doctor in before shifting over to Maria.
Dr. Yoffe steps to the side of the bed and Maria follows him. He pulls one of the chairs close and lowers into it, taking Aiden’s hand in his own. “We need to have a serious talk. I know you’re tired but if you could just hang with me for a little bit so we can ask you some questions, I’d appreciate it.”
My heart cracks in two as something passes across Aiden’s face that looks a lot like he understands exactly why everyone is in the room right now. There is a brief flicker of anger, maybe defiance, but then it mists away into resignation.
Aiden props himself up straighter. “Okay.”
Lilly nudges his leg from the other side of the bed, a silent request that he scoot so she can sit beside him. Dr. Yoffe introduces Maria and merely calls her a nurse who will be working with him closely for the remainder of Aiden’s time in the hospital. I lean back against the wall and Steven stays in his chair.
I’m not sure if it was discussed in detail how they’d reveal to Aiden what’s going on, but it seems they give him a choreographed duet of information. Dr. Yoffe explains his medical condition and Lilly helps to translate it into easier, digestible bites. She does this while holding Aiden’s other hand. They lay out everything exactly the way Lilly laid it out to me last night.
Aiden’s first question was Lilly’s and then my main question.
“Am I going to die?”
He asks this of Lilly and no one else, for he trusts her the most.
My heart fucking aches for Lilly and she bends forward to brush her lips across his forehead. Her voice remains calm and steady, and I’m in awe of her strength. “We need a miracle, Aiden, but if we are not graced with one, yes… you’re going to die.”
Tears prickle at my eyes as Lilly’s voice quavers a bit, but she reins it in. “But I’m not going to leave your side, not for a single second. If your body chooses to rally and fight, I’m going to be here cheering you on. And if you just can’t fight anymore… if your body is ready to let go, that’s okay too, Aiden. I’ll be holding you the entire time.”
Steven curls in on himself, puts his hands over his face and quietly weeps. Dr. Yoffe’s eyes have a sheen to them and Lilly is freely crying. I don’t even think to try to stop my tears. This is no time to be without emotion. Aiden should see how loved he is.