Total pages in book: 84
Estimated words: 86510 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 433(@200wpm)___ 346(@250wpm)___ 288(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 86510 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 433(@200wpm)___ 346(@250wpm)___ 288(@300wpm)
But practical sense isn’t the only reason I do it.
I prefer exclusivity because then we both know what to expect.
My submissives find out soon enough that I exert complete dominance over them. That understanding is crucial, because in all of the time that I’ve been in this lifestyle, I’ve never had a submissive use a safe word.
That’s because she knows, before we even begin, that I will be in control. She understands, before we ever begin, that I am her master.
Which is why I should probably walk away from Mary. If she’s this reluctant to play with me, she will never be one to let me have complete dominance over her.
But I can’t walk away.
In some strange way, she’s beguiled me. It’s like she’s a bird of prey and she’s sunk her talons into my soul.
Funny. I never thought I had a soul.
I’m not in love with her. I hardly know her.
But I feel like fate has led me to her. As if I’m in some strange paranormal romance and I found my fated mate.
Because the one word that comes to my mind when I look at Mary is just that.
Mine.
Chapter Ten
Mary
When he looks at me with his blue eyes, I’m ready to follow him anywhere.
But I know better. I know I’m not ready, no matter how much Brenda tells me I need to get back in the saddle.
I’m just not ready to give myself over to a Dominant yet.
As attracted as I am to Ronan, and as much as I’m beginning to like him, I don’t expect him to wait around forever.
Still, a concrete block dropped off my shoulders when he told me he didn’t want me to introduce him to other subs.
That would’ve cracked my heart in two, which makes absolutely no sense.
I don’t normally see Dominants outside the club. We don’t date. Yet I took Ronan to get a slice of pizza last night, and it felt…right.
It felt normal. It felt so normal that I didn’t want the evening to end, so I took him to the Top of the Rock, one of my favorite places in the world.
Maybe I do want to date.
But I can’t date Ronan O’Connor. He’s as forceful a Dominant as I’ve met in a long time.
Power exudes from him, as if he’s surrounded in a glowing gold halo of dominance.
Yet he thinks this is a date. He actually used the word date.
Maybe the best thing is to ask him.
“Ronan?”
“Yes?” He takes a sip of his drink.
I pause a moment, trying to gather the right words. “Why are you with me tonight? Why don’t you want me to introduce you to another submissive?”
He leans into me. “I’ve met the submissive I want.”
My cheeks warm, and my nipples harden against the stretchy fabric of my dress. I’m sure my whole chest must be scarlet, even in the dim lighting.
“You seem very sure of yourself,” I say.
“A good Dominant is always sure.”
He’s not wrong.
“What if I’m not sure this is me anymore?” I ask.
“Then you wouldn’t be here.”
Again, he’s not wrong.
This lifestyle will always be a part of who I am, whether I play or not. But if I’m never comfortable enough to play a scene again, what am I doing here? I paid my membership dues for the year, so I can say I don’t want to waste the money.
That’s not really the reason, though. Membership for single women is not all that expensive in a club like this. Single men, on the other hand, get hosed with the fees.
“What if I want to leave?” I ask.
“No one is stopping you.”
But he’s stopping me. He doesn’t realize it, but he is. I feel bound to him in some strange way—as if he came all the way across the Atlantic to find me. Still, I’m not ready to play. Not even with this gorgeous Dominant who arouses me just by his presence. My flesh is sizzling, and I’m squirming against the heat between my thighs.
As if he’s reading my mind, Ronan drops his gaze to my chest. “You sure you don’t want to play?”
“I’m sure.”
His brows draw downward. Have I upset him?
“I didn’t say I wasn’t attracted to you, Ronan. Look in the mirror. Any woman would be attracted to you. Any submissive.”
“Yet the woman I want most right now doesn’t seem to want me.”
I shake my head, take a sip of my tangy drink. “It’s not that simple.”
“Do you want to level with me?”
“About what?”
“About what happened to make you this way. Something spooked you, Blossom,” he says, taking care to use my submissive name at the club. “I can assure you, you have nothing to fear from me.”
“I don’t have anything to fear from anyone in here.”
“Still…something has you changing your tune. What is it?”
I sigh. I want to tell him. I really want to open up to him.