Total pages in book: 97
Estimated words: 87908 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 440(@200wpm)___ 352(@250wpm)___ 293(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 87908 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 440(@200wpm)___ 352(@250wpm)___ 293(@300wpm)
In the beginning when I’d been younger, I’d tried to tell Creed that she wasn’t what she pretended to be, but somehow she was always able to convince him that I was lying. I’d eventually just stopped trying.
But that night, when I was wearing the best dress because he’d insisted and I’d got my hair and nails done because again he’d said his babygirl deserved the best memory of that night. His babygirl, I use to love the way he called me that. Still do, but for different reasons.
But that night had been magic, and then it was over and he was gone, until now. Of course we’d talked on the phone, but even those conversations had become stilted and hollow.
It had almost broken my heart when I realized that I was losing him too, not Creed, he was supposed to be mine for always. But the last almost three years had been almost unbearable without him.
There were so many times when I felt like just telling him the truth about how I felt, or running away and hiding. Those were the two choices I’d given myself, but in the end I could never leave my Creed.
Now he’s back and he’s taking me away with him and I’m afraid, afraid of what was going to happen if he left me behind again. I’m not a little kid anymore and by all rights he doesn’t owe me anything.
My heart hurt at the thought of me losing him. What if he gets married and has a family of his own? What if he meets someone that doesn’t understand or accept my place in his life? Why can’t he choose me?
I know he thinks I’m just a silly little girl who won’t fit into his life. He probably thinks I’m too stupid to even know anything about that, but I’ve always known everything about him.
Like how he’d saved a bunch of people when he was away at war, or how he’d burned out a whole village to save his fellow soldiers when they’d been captured and were about to be beheaded.
That one had scared me a lot. It was the first time I’d realized that being in a war was nothing like the romantic movies they showed us on TV.
The only reason I’d learned about any of his exploits is because I’d signed up for every army social media in our area. I’d had to pretend to be the daughter of a deployed soldier, which I kinda was, except…no better not let my mind wander there too much this time. Not with him just a few feet away.
This was the first time in years that we’d been alone together and I was determined not to do anything to mess it up. I didn’t want him to go away for a long time again, and since I was never too sure what had made him leave last time, I wasn’t about to take any chances.
My aunt Dee had said it was something I’d done, probably my complaining to him about stuff. But that couldn’t be true because I never complained about anything, not anymore. Not since the beginning when she would convince him that everything I said was a lie.
I’d resented him for that as well, and though it wasn’t in my nature to yell and scream, I’ve wanted to with him a couple times. But always I’d remember his smile and his kindness. That he was the only one in my life who’d ever treated me with true kindness, and my heart would melt.
Besides, I wasn’t that dumb that I didn’t see what was going on. She had him fooled just like she had everyone else. She’d only stopped hitting me because of the one time Creed had noticed a mark and as is his way had asked about it.
She’d slithered her way out of that one too, and though I’d tried to tell him with my eyes that she was lying he’d fallen for her made up story once again. Two days later I’d learned why he’d been so preoccupied. He’d been given orders to go in and bring out his comrades.
The papers had been very vague about the rescue, and of course he wasn’t the only one involved, but they’d hailed him personally. I’d never been so proud in my life, and I’d forgiven him for disappointing me once again where she was concerned.
I’d just always told myself that one day I’ll make him listen to me and then he’d be sorry that he hadn’t all along. But that was when I was young, before the changes.
As time went on I learned to keep my mouth shut and stay out of the way, she’d convinced me that he only listened to her anyway, and that nothing I said bore any weight. It was only as I got older and started hanging around other people that I started to doubt her. But by then there was a sort of rift between him and I. One that I had no idea how to fix.