Total pages in book: 36
Estimated words: 33407 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 167(@200wpm)___ 134(@250wpm)___ 111(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 33407 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 167(@200wpm)___ 134(@250wpm)___ 111(@300wpm)
I love all the little ways he’s always looking out for me. I’ve never had someone do that.
“How did the radio interviews go?” I ask him when we’re on the road.
He shrugs. “They went like they always go. I tried to talk, and Thea shut me up.” The grin he sends me lets me know he’s not upset. “It’s probably for the best that she doesn’t let me share every thought in my head.”
“I guess that part of being famous kind of sucks,” I tell him. I can’t imagine having to carefully weigh almost everything I say, always having to be worried that I’d lose my career if I said the wrong thing.
“It comes with the territory. Now, how did your day go?”
Other than Sadie, I don’t really have anyone to talk to about how my day is going, and I really love that he asked. I launch into a detailed discussion about the articles I’m writing and the research I’m doing for them.
As we drive to the next town over, he asks me a million questions about my job and how I got started doing it. He’s like this every time we’re together, always wanting to learn more about me.
He pulls into a big parking lot with a sign announcing it as an outdoor movie theater. “I love old movies and I thought…”
I smile at him. “This is perfect.”
Together, we get seats underneath an old oak tree that has twinkling lights wrapped around it.
Zac puts a blanket over my lap and produces snacks, including trail mix. He offers some to me, oblivious to the other moviegoers who are casting us side glances.
“It doesn’t bother you to be seen with me?”
“You mean being seen with the most beautiful woman in the theater?” He growls in such a deep tone that my panties go damp.
I shrug, not sure how to put it into words, but Zac won’t let the conversation end there. In a soft voice, he asks, “Who made you feel anything less than precious?”
Tears prick at the back of my eyes. I think about calling my parents earlier today and getting their voicemail. “Your family is wonderful. They’re so loving and close. I didn’t know that families were supposed to be so warm until I met yours.”
“You don’t have that,” he says, understanding in his tone.
“My parents weren’t exactly thrilled to have a kid. It’s not something that was said in so many words, but they never cared much for me.”
He reaches out and takes my hand, running his thumb along the back of it. “Tell me.”
“They’re wealthy. Like crazy wealthy, but they never wanted kids. Then there I was, ruining their lives by being born.”
“And they always resented you,” Zac sums up.
I nod, relieved that he seems to understand. “I’ve never talked a lot about my parents to anyone. I thought it would sound ungrateful.”
Zac makes a noise of outrage. “It’s not ungrateful to want to be loved.”
“That’s how they made it seem. I’ve spent my life trying to be small enough to please them. Then it was quiet enough, and now I’m aiming for accomplished enough.”
Zac presses his lips to the back of my hand. “You are enough. You’re worthy of being loved just how you are. If you’ll give me the chance, I’ll spend the rest of my life making sure you know how very special you are.”
I sniff and look away. The moment is too much for me. There are too many feelings in my heart. The sadness and grief over not having my parents’ love, the giddiness over how Zac treats me, and the fear that one day, he’ll grow tired of me.
The theme for the movie starts and interrupts our quiet moment. Fortunately, Zac accepts that I don’t want to talk about this anymore.
He opens an oversized chocolate bar and offers me half.
I nibble on the edge. “I struggle with an eating disorder.”
I don’t want any secrets between me and Zac. He’s already been supportive of me about my parents, and I want him to know everything about me. Even if it’s scary to be vulnerable and open with another person, I want to try being brave.
He freezes as soon as I say that. “Was the chocolate a bad idea?”
I chuckle and shake my head. “I wanted you to know. I went to therapy for it a couple of years ago. I still struggle sometimes. My mom used to tell me when I was a kid that a lady never eats more than three bites at once. I guess that kind of stuck in my brain. Well, that and her constant insistence on weighing me.”
He growls under his breath. “No one should do that to a child. You deserved better.”
His words give me a warm, tingly glow.
“I guess some part of me always thought, if I were small enough, I would be worth their attention,” I explain. All those years of therapy and I never made that connection. Maybe it’s because I feel so safe and seen with Zac that I finally understand my parents never offered me love. Not real, authentic love that accepts you as you are.