Total pages in book: 88
Estimated words: 81113 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 406(@200wpm)___ 324(@250wpm)___ 270(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 81113 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 406(@200wpm)___ 324(@250wpm)___ 270(@300wpm)
Not if I could help it. I knew, logically, that I would’ve had to tell her at some point but I’d just hoped that I could put that day off for as long as possible. Maybe until the baby was born and I could fudge things about when and how I got pregnant.
The cat’s out of the bag now, though.
I supposed that I could go with most of the truth. The emotional truth of it, anyway. Not the whole burdening Michael part, because that might give away the identity of the father, but other aspects.
“I was embarrassed,” I admitted. “I still am. I feel so stupid. You know I’ve always been… you know I’ve always tried to be smart. And here I was, my first sexual relationship and I wound up pregnant. Sounds like a stupid soap opera, right?”
“No, no it doesn’t,” Brooke said, switching from hurt to soothing on a dime. That was Brooke all over for you, always ready to be there and comfort you. She took my hand across the table, squeezing it gently. “Sex is messy, relationships are messy, shit happens.”
I nodded, but that didn’t make me feel all that much better. “I didn’t know how to tell you. Or tell anyone. Not even my parents know. I haven’t told anybody. I’m sure some of my coworkers have guessed but I haven’t confirmed it.”
“Nobody’s going to shame you,” Brooke replied. “Nobody’s going to be angry.”
“You don’t know that,” I replied. “And… it would be one thing if I had a steady relationship and it happened, the father and I could work things out but… but the father isn’t in the picture anymore.”
Brooke inhaled sharply, her eyes going wide. “Does the father know?”
I shook my head. “Hell no he doesn’t, and he’s not going to, okay? I didn’t fucking tell him and I’m not going to, and you’d better not either. Our relationship was over before I found out. I mean it wasn’t even a proper fucking relationship, y’know? But whatever it was, it was already over, then I found out, and I wasn’t going to….it’s my choice to keep the baby. I’m choosing that. It’s my body, my choice. I’m not getting him involved with that.”
Brooke tilted her head to the side. “Well of course it’s your body, your choice. But, surely he could help a little?”
I shook my head. “No. It’s not what he wanted or what he asked for and so I think this is best.”
Brooke gave my hand another squeeze, then let go with a small sigh. “It’s Cameron, isn’t it? The father?”
Once again: hoo boy.
Brooke had already figured out that I was far enough along the baby couldn’t be the child of someone I’d slept with in Sacramento. In fact she had probably already put two and two together and figured out this was why I’d moved so suddenly.
What was I supposed to do? I had said that I didn’t want the father to know, so it would be kept safe from Cameron. And he was exactly the kind of guy who would get a girl knocked up. But could I really deface his character like that? Assign to him a mistake that wasn’t his?
On the other hand—how could I possibly tell Brooke the truth? Hey, I’m pregnant with your father’s child! You’re gonna be a big sister!
Brooke had always said she’d wished she had a younger sibling but surely she didn’t want it like this. I couldn’t do that to her. Spring it on her like that. And without her dad around to add his side of the story…
No, there was no way that I could tell her the truth. I just didn’t have the heart to hurt her like that. And what would be the point in telling the truth? I wasn’t going to burden Michael with this, and Brooke would just run back and tell him immediately, and my whole reason for running to Sacramento would be for naught. But if I didn’t tell her, and she kept it a secret, and just stayed away…
It wasn’t a permanent solution, but it was something. It was better than nothing, anyway, better than letting the cat out of the bag right that moment.
So I… well. I technically didn’t lie. I just didn’t correct her, either.
“You have to promise me that you won’t tell anyone,” I said, leaning in. Brooke stared at me and I leaned in a little more. “No one, okay? You have to keep this to yourself. I don’t want anybody knowing that I’m pregnant, it’s why I came up here. I’m going to have to tell my family, but they’re the only people I intend to have find out.”
Brooke looks disbelieving. “Are you sure?”
“Yes. Definitely. Especially at the restaurant, okay? Nobody can know there.”
“I suppose…” Brooke sighs. “I don’t understand, Stevie, I really don’t, but it’s your choice. I’ll keep your secret.”