Total pages in book: 82
Estimated words: 77852 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 389(@200wpm)___ 311(@250wpm)___ 260(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 77852 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 389(@200wpm)___ 311(@250wpm)___ 260(@300wpm)
“But working outside is tough work, let alone in the stables. She could cook or clean, but she decided to do something else. That woman is made of something stronger than everyone else. I can tell just by looking at her. She’s a survivor, she’s a hard worker. She’s the kind of woman that makes a boy a man.”
She definitely made me into a man every night. And she’d definitely survived horrendous tragedies. Anyone else would have been too scared to run from Knuckles in the first place, for fear of a crueler punishment. But not Muse. She hauled ass and didn’t give up. She made sacrifices in order to keep going, and even when she hit rock bottom, she still kept her dignity. People earned respect when they were at the height of their success, but respect should be earned when you’re at the bottom of your resources. That was when character was truly tested. Her character had been tested, and she bloomed like a rose. “Yes, she’s exceptional.”
“When are you going to ask her?”
“Ask her what?”
My father turned his gaze on me. “To marry you.”
I held his gaze and felt my heart pound in my chest. When my father stared at me with those powerful eyes, I couldn’t back down. I had to be worthy of his look. “It’s too soon for that.”
“But it’s not too soon for her to live with you?” he countered. “If you love her, marry her.”
“I never said I loved her.”
“Are you saying you don’t?” He narrowed his eyes.
I didn’t want to lie to my father. It made me feel like shit on the bottom of his shoe. I respected him too much to give him false information. It made me feel deceitful, like I was betraying him. But to tell him the truth would be worse, that she was merely a slave I purchased for my own pleasure. I would be no better than the men he despised. His disappointment would kill me, and I would never recover from the deadly blow. “I do.” I forced the words out, feeling them burn my throat on the way out. My heart rate picked up slightly, the blood pounding in my ears. An adrenaline rush moved through me, and I wasn’t sure if it was from the lie I just told, or the feeling I got from saying the words. “I’m just not ready for that kind of commitment right now.”
He continued to stare at me, his jaw hard and his eyes deadly.
“What?”
“I didn’t say anything.”
“But you’re looking at me like you’re saying something.”
He looked forward again and gave a slight nod toward Muse. “I just know women like that are rare. Not only is she beautiful, but she’s got spunk. She reminds me of your mother. And I wished I had married her sooner only so I could enjoy as much time with her as possible. A single lifetime just isn’t long enough.” He rested his arms on the armrests. “I tried to remain uncommitted as long as I could, but then your mother left me.”
This was brand-new information to me. The limited information I had about them suggested they’d been happily in love since the day they met. “She left you?”
“Yes. She said she loved me, and I refused to say it back. I wasn’t a man at the time. I was scared of feeling anything, scared of losing someone else I cared about. It was easier just to live an empty life. But when she left…I never felt more alone. Just don’t make the same mistake I did. If you’ve found the woman you love, don’t drag your feet. Be the man that she deserves. Because before you know it…” He snapped his fingers. “Someone else can replace you.”
The idea of Muse being with another man besides me made me sick to my stomach.
“That’s my advice, son. I can tell you’re her whole world.”
My father was never wrong about anything, but this was a one-time exception. Muse was jealous and didn’t want to share me with anyone, but that didn’t mean she loved me. How could she love me after what I did to her? How could she love me in our situation? I wasn’t sure what we had, but it was a complicated relationship based on forced servitude and a strange friendship.
“I can read people well,” he continued. “And I know I’m not wrong about her.”
* * *
It was midnight when we finally went to my bedroom on the second floor. My old bedroom was exactly how I left it, the gray comforter blending in with the dark wood of the headboard. I had a small sitting area with a TV, along with a private bathroom. It had a balcony that faced the east side of the property.
Muse stepped inside and took a look around. It was bare, tidy, and neat. I didn’t have posters on the wall or collections. I’d spent most of my time outside the house when I was growing up, except at night when I’d sneak women over. That’s when my obsession with lingerie emerged. Touching their bras and panties and peeling them off was the best part about sex.