Total pages in book: 87
Estimated words: 83394 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 417(@200wpm)___ 334(@250wpm)___ 278(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 83394 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 417(@200wpm)___ 334(@250wpm)___ 278(@300wpm)
“Hey, it’s okay. I’m not going anywhere. We don’t have to rush,” he said softly.
“Was it not good?”
“Are you kidding? I almost embarrassed myself and came in my jeans. I’ve never done that. I just… This is new.”
Oh…oops. I was rushing him. “Sorry.”
“Don’t be.” His thumb drew circles on my cheek, and he pushed my hair off my forehead, touched me and smiled, maybe the truest smile I’d ever seen from Gage. “I can’t believe we’re doing this.”
I laughed. “You and me both.”
“I can’t believe I never realized…not on my end.” Then he pulled me closer and kissed me again. I felt like I was flying, like the sun was living inside me, rising and waking up the world. Like I would burst, and stars would shoot out of me.
Gage tugged and I followed, climbed right over, straddled his lap, and kissed and kissed and kissed. God, was there anything in the world better than kissing?
My jaw started to hurt, but I didn’t care. I never wanted to stop. The world could have ended right then, and I would have died happy.
Gage eased back first. “We do need to slow down, or I’m gonna spooge in my pants.”
“Please, I wanna see, and I probably will too.”
He laughed, his chest vibrating against mine. “I can’t believe I’m your boyfriend.” I liked that. Gage being my boyfriend. He held on to my waist, let his fingers dip under my shirt and rub my stomach. “How long have you known?”
“That I was gay, or that I love you? I knew I loved you before I knew what it meant to be gay.”
Gage frowned, looked out the window. “I should have known… And maybe I always did too, but I was afraid to let myself see what it was.”
“That you’re gay, or that you…”
“I don’t know that I’m gay. I have to be something. I like girls, I just…I just love you.”
Happiness filled me, made me float. Gage loved me too. I kissed him again, couldn’t stop myself.
We stayed out there for hours, alternating between kissing and talking, always touching each other, whether it was holding hands, or his hands on my hips, or my arms around his shoulders.
Eventually, he said, “You should keep being friends with Mike if you want. I don’t wanna take that away from you. I mean, I’m not going to stop being friends with Katie, and there might be stuff you wanna talk to him about.”
“Okay.”
Nothing could come between us in that moment. More than anything, I wanted it to last.
“I’m sorry,” Gage said, the tips of his fingers dancing over my cheeks, my chin, up to my forehead, like he couldn’t stop touching me.
“For what?”
“For ever hurting you…for taking so long.”
“It doesn’t matter how long you took. We’re here now.”
He smiled and kissed me again.
CHAPTER SEVEN
Gage
I thought being with a guy might feel strange, something I had to get used to, but this was Joey. It was mostly like it had been before, only we kissed a lot. We kissed every chance we got, and fuck if he wasn’t really good at it. I loved that I knew his taste and smell and was familiar with how he moved—the way he started out slowly, and sometimes nibbled at my lip, and made whimpering sounds that pulled from the back of his throat, seeping into me.
We hadn’t done anything more than kiss and grind against each other with our clothes on or in our underwear, but even that was good. He did this little inhale thing before he had an orgasm, like he couldn’t get in enough air. God, I loved making him do that.
It was like we couldn’t get close enough, like we were afraid at any moment this would be taken away from us, but I didn’t know why. Yeah, his father was a fucking bastard, but we only had to wait until graduation, and then we could get the hell out of there. Before, I’d been pessimistic about it, but now I had no doubt I’d find a way to be with him.
We didn’t let anyone at school know. Katie knew, of course, and I still trusted her. When we were together, or with Mouse and Romeo, Jojo and I got to just be, and that was all that mattered. I could deal with everything else in life as long as I had him.
It was Christmas break now, the weather too cold for me to walk to his house at night. I’d been putting money away, saving for after graduation, but I was considering buying a cheap used car—and when I said cheap, I meant that. It probably wouldn’t last, but I was pretty good with cars and with my hands, so whatever I could find, I’d do the work on it myself. Jojo’s father wouldn’t let him have his own car. He liked control too much.