Total pages in book: 89
Estimated words: 87766 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 439(@200wpm)___ 351(@250wpm)___ 293(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 87766 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 439(@200wpm)___ 351(@250wpm)___ 293(@300wpm)
“Oh.” I sense Luci’s fake excitement and smile. “I mean,” she coughs. “That’s great, a big deal right? To speak?”
“Yeah,” I sigh. “It’s just until next Thursday,” I reassure her.
“Right, yeah,” she smiles. “When do you leave?”
“Tomorrow morning,” I sigh.
“Wow, that’s soon!”
“I know,” I chuckle. Leave it to Luci to make me forget about everything else in the world. “It… escaped me.”
“Well, just think about it,” she practically begs. “Because what if going out with her is the key to her not saying anything?”
“And then after the date?” I argue. “Then what? We’re still hiding because she’s going to want more!”
“If you don’t want to try,” she sighs, and I groan, trying to figure out how to make her understand that that’s not it at all.
She nods slowly at my silence, and her forehead creases. “There’s still something you’ve said that bothers me,” she hesitates.
“Just one thing?” I joke, and she gives me a look. “Sorry, go ahead.”
“You said, ‘this time it can be real,’” she pauses. “But, the thing is, for me, the last time was real.”
I sigh out of frustration, not with her, but at myself. I just can’t seem to accurately express my words to her, or put things as eloquently as she does. I fall silent, thinking and debating, all while staring into her eager, deep brown eyes. They’re so soft and pleading that they knock me back while simultaneously make me feel whole.
“I’m going to tell you this in a way that I think will freak you out the least.” I’m the one who’s wavering now, trying to choose my words carefully. “You know from the moment I saw you I was in love. So much so, that it scared me shitless,” I halt, staring at her, making sure she understands what I’m saying, so there’s no confusion. “Everything from those last two sentences is still, to this day, very true.
I let out a deep breath, taking in her stunned expression. “So I guess if you’ll excuse me, I have to go ask someone that I don’t even like out on a date, in order to date the person I really want to be with.”
Chapter 9
-Luci-
Did Josh just admit that he’s still in love with me? He’s said he still has strong feelings for me before, but love? There’s a difference!
I pace around the halls for a bit before heading to my classroom, and Brittney keeps me so busy that I don’t see Josh for the rest of the day. He doesn’t text me, and I think he’s upset that I want him to go on a date with her. I mean it’s not what I want, but I don’t like this impending threat on his job and reputation. Plus, should him and I actually date, how horrible would it be if we started off with someone already wanting to tear us apart?
I don’t even hear from him for the rest of the day, or night, and tomorrow he leaves for the trip he totally forgot about. It’s going to be a long week.
The weekend was completely agonizing, and I had so many texts written out to him, but ended up deleting them all. Between his admission of love, and after me pushing him to ask Brittney on a date, I don’t know what to say to make things better. I’m mad and confused on multiple levels.
When Monday morning rolls around, I can’t take the fact that it’s been days since we spoke, so I finally text him as I’m walking into school.
It’s weird being here knowing you’re so far away!
Hey! His reply is immediate, and I can’t help my smile as I walk upstairs. I want to ask what ended up happening with Brittney when he spoke to her, if he even did, which I’m assuming so, since by late afternoon Friday she was so happy I stupidly became envious.
How’s the conference going? I arrive at my classroom, placing my phone under my chin as I open the door.
Okay, sort of boring.
When do you speak? I step inside and throw my bag on my desk.
Yesterday. His answer is short, and I can’t help but get the feeling he doesn’t want to talk. This is why I hate texting, because I can never tell. I really hope he’s not still mad.
Well, I hope it went well. I guess I’ll see you when you get back!
A second later, my phone is ringing.
“Hello?” I leave the classroom. Since the lights were on when I got here, it means that Brittney is already here.
The halls are still empty as I make my way down them, and I pass a row of lockers until I get to the other side of the second floor, pausing on the staircase landing.
“Hi,” he yawns. “Sorry, I’m not good at texting when I’m so tired.”