Total pages in book: 89
Estimated words: 87766 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 439(@200wpm)___ 351(@250wpm)___ 293(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 87766 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 439(@200wpm)___ 351(@250wpm)___ 293(@300wpm)
The class murmurs in the background, enjoying their extra moments of freedom. Gracie stops to talk to Luci before heading inside, and I’m still watching Luci as she retreats down the hall, admiring.
My attention eventually reverts back to the class, and I begin the lesson. Gracie keeps on giving me weird looks, because I can’t help but stare awkwardly at her. I owe her so much, and I can’t get over the fact that Luci is here right now.
I jump through the lesson, and I know no one understands a thing, but I can’t seem to get my shit together, and I think I’m more relived than they are when the bell rings. They can’t pack up and leave fast enough, and as soon as the last person exits I bound to my office, bracing myself before opening the door.
Luci stands immediately.
“I wasn’t snooping or anything, I swear!” I hate the look on her face already. “It just lit up with a text from someone named Lisa, confirming your date for Friday.”
“Oh,” I nod.
“Yeah,” she sighs, still standing. “It’s… okay?” She looks up at the ceiling. “I didn’t think you were going to wait around after our conversation at dinner. I mean, I’m still mad at you, and we’re just friends. God this is so stupid!”
“You said friends,” I feel my face fall. “I was trying to mo-”
“I know what I said!” She moves towards me angrily.
So she doesn’t know what she wants, and I think I may have just made that decision for her. Fuck!
“I don’t even have to go. I don’t even want to go.”
“I- I-” She stumbles.
I can’t seem to ever do the right thing. Ever.
“Then why did you agree to it?” She asks, and I suddenly find myself getting angry.
“Don’t you still have a boyfriend?” I demand, and she swallows hard before nodding, her eyes red and welling.
“Luci,” I exhale. “What are we doing?” I run my ringers through my hair.
“I don’t know,” she huffs, shoving past me and out the door. I sink down into my chair with my head in my hands.
So much for a friendly reunion in my office.
~*~*~*~*~
I left Luci a message every day the rest of this week, and she still hasn’t me called back. I check my phone one last time before getting into my car to meet Lisa in the city.
I turn the key and the engine revs to life, but I sit unmoving in my parking spot, wondering if I’m doing the right thing. I just want to be with Luci or be able to move on. Is that too much to ask?
I finally pull out onto Main Street, pressing the buttons on my phone to try Luci one more time.
“Hello?” The male voice catches me off guard.
“Um,” I clear my throat, my confidence shattered. “Is Luci around?”
Fuck, I should’ve just hung up.
“Luke!” I hear her voice in the background.
“What?” He laughs. “You were dancing!”
“Don’t touch my phone, okay?” She yells before her voice comes on. “Hello?”
“Um,” I clear my throat again. Fuck, this is bad.
“Hello?” She yells again, but her voice cuts off, as if she’s finally looking at who it is.
“Hey,” my voice cracks.
“Oh,” she sighs. “It’s you.”
“I, um… are you out?” What a dumb question. Of course she is!
“Yeah,” she answers. “Sorry I didn’t call you back. It’s just… not easy talking to you all the time.”
“Yeah, you had said that,” I nod to myself. “And Luke is…”
“The guy I’m seeing,” she answers.
“Right,” I nod again.
“You can’t do this,” she whispers, and I know that she’s right. “You made a decision to continue trying to move on,” she swallows. “Let me do the same.”
That’s it. The line is dead.
I turn my car around and head back to my apartment. I don’t know why.
I unlock my door and rush down the dark hallway until I reach my bedroom. I make a mess out of my nightstand draw just trying to find what I’m looking for. It takes me a bit, but as soon as I do, I hurry back to my car, driving to a city that’s not the one I’m supposed to be going to tonight.
It feels like I’ve walked around campus for hours until I finally find the name on the building that matches the one scribbled on the back of the picture I’m holding. The photo is from June 2002, of Luci and I at her graduation. It’s not a good one of us - she’s devastated, and I too have obviously seen better days. Still, it reminds me of the wonderful year that we had.
After scouring each floor I finally find the whitewash board that has Luci and her roommate’s name on it. It shakes violently against the door with each one of my knocks, and when it opens, I’m met with the face I came to see.