Total pages in book: 88
Estimated words: 81787 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 409(@200wpm)___ 327(@250wpm)___ 273(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 81787 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 409(@200wpm)___ 327(@250wpm)___ 273(@300wpm)
“Make no mistake, this is about Sarah. You’re her father. She wants to live with you, and that’s where she belongs. As for the past, it’s done. I can’t go back and change it.”
It was done. That was her excuse. It was the past, and her actions had harmed my daughter. Maybe not physically, but emotionally. If she thought her coming here to help with Cleo and bringing Belladonna were enough to fix it, she was wrong. So fucking wrong.
“Where is Sarah?” Oakley asked, looking past me.
I wanted to tell her to leave. We didn’t need her. Sarah had me, and she didn’t need anyone else. Especially someone from this family. But I knew sending her away would hurt Sarah. I had to find a way to balance Sarah’s love for Oakley and my hate for her. How the hell I was supposed to do that, I didn’t know. It had been years since I’d had to speak to Oakley. Now, I was Sarah’s only parent that would change.
“In her room, packing,” I replied grudgingly.
“What are you going to do with this place?” she asked me, as if she had a right to know.
I had no answer for her, but even if I did, why should I tell her? It wasn’t her business. I had never signed the house over to Sylvia because I hadn’t trusted her. I wanted Oakley to have a home, a house, a yard, a fucking dog. Even if she couldn’t have two parents under one roof, I wanted to give her everything else I could. I paid all their bills, including the mortgage.
“I don’t know. I guess sell it. My life isn’t here. I can’t move back here,” I replied, wishing those damn eyes of hers didn’t make me talk. Say shit I didn’t have to.
Oakley placed the can down on the bar and stared out the window over the kitchen sink. “Not real sure her memories of this house, at least in the last few years, are some she wants to remember,” Oakley said solemnly. Then, she turned to meet my gaze. “Sell it. Move her to Florida, give her a fresh start. Help erase all … all the bad.”
The bad that I should have been told about. The bad that she wouldn’t have lived through if she had been with me. My hands fisted at my sides.
Belladonna let out another low growl.
“It’s best you stop with the pent-up anger at me. If you want Belladonna to like you, that is,” Oakley said.
I wasn’t going to be threatened by a dog that looked like an overgrown stuffed bear. Ignoring her warning, I scowled. “I didn’t know it had gotten bad. That Sylvia had stopped taking her meds. Sarah never told me anything. I can’t—” I paused and hissed at the ache in my chest. “I failed her.”
I wanted to shout that she had failed her too. But I didn’t. For Sarah’s sake.
For a brief moment, just a tiny fraction, there was a flicker of something other than indifference. As if she might care deep down or simply remember when she had. I missed the girl I had destroyed. She still haunted my dreams. The first time I had seen her, the first time she’d turned those blue eyes on me and smiled. I wasn’t sure I’d ever truly be able to let her go. At least not in my memories. The woman she had become, her actions, that person I would never love. I would tolerate her for my daughter.
“We did everything we could to get Sylvia help. She chose not to take her medication. She chose not to go to the therapist. This was her choice. This wasn’t your fault. You didn’t know. We didn’t tell you. Cleo was afraid you’d take Sarah from Sylvia if you knew. If you want to blame someone, blame us. You deserved to know. It was me who failed Sarah. I was the one who should have told you. Instead, I came to get Sarah and keep her with me, or I stayed here. But I couldn’t always be there for her. I have a job, and it interfered some. She … she should have been with you. I’m the one who has to live with that. Me. Not you.”
I stood there, staring at the girl who had been my sole obsession years ago. I’d have done anything to have her, and I had. She was a light in my darkness. She’d given me fucking joy. Made me want to be a better man. Watching the anguish on her face while she blamed herself for all that Sarah had lived through took some of that hatred in my chest from me. It was hard to listen to her blame herself even if I had.
The man I had been before Sylvia, the guy who had fallen in love with Oakley at first sight, wanted to go pull her into my arms and assure her that this shit was on me. Sarah was my daughter. I had known Sylvia battled with bipolar disorder, but I had thought that she was taking her medication and seeing her therapist. When I asked, she told me she was, and I believed her.